Tonight’s Experiences


Dog, Sleep, Lazy, Tired, Relax


Well, after having a pretty good day, decent energy, I crashed and burned hard around 8pm, which happened to be the time of the 8 minute Global Meditation.  I sunk quickly into the meditation, right ear suddenly buzzing loudly – very loudly – and moments later my body screamed “lay down NOW”, which I did, and promptly fell asleep for about 45 minutes.  I awoke to the enthusiastic callings of one small child yelling “mama mama!” who wanted me to tuck her into bed.

Did that mean I had to MOVE, I grumbled in my mind.

So I pull myself up, crawl into my girl’s bed, snuggle us both up and read a couple of stories before giving the normal million hugs and kisses. Feeling like an absolute slug, I pull myself up yet again out of another bed, walk back to my bedroom in a zombified state and pick out clothes to wear after the nice long hot shower I intended on taking.

Didn’t go quite as planned.  The picking out of the clothes part.  I was looking for something in particular ~ and could not find it.  You see, the weather has gone from 85 and sunny to 55 and rain in a matter of 48 hours and my body is trying to play “catch-up”.  I suddenly want yoga pants and comfy tops.  I could not find my comfy tops at first and given my almost drunk-like mindset tonight, this suddenly had me feeling like a little girl.  I wanted my comfy top, the pink comfy top in particular!  Tears formed in my eyes and I stomped my foot.

Then I drooled a bit in my state of fluster.  (no joke)

Yes, I was quite a sight.  Wow, I am that tired and that affected by these 40 hz plus continual spikes, I thought.  What began as a feeling of bliss and calm this morning manifested into a toddler storm by evening. Whoever wrote of these times bringing out bi-polar states was not kidding.

After a long hot shower, I am now parked on the couch, cup of hot tea, feet on my foot massager, hot buddies on my back.  And obviously typing at the moment, although it has taken me longer than expected. Apparently along with my inability to balance my check book, find my calendars and keep track of all of this 3d reality “stuff”, I seem to be having a difficult time typing.  Spelling used to be my forte.  Now my fingers struggle to type the words my brain is speaking.

For now.

I also sit here and ponder the big question:  Why isn’t everyone having these experiences?  These days I am not as shy about asking others “how you feeling?  feeling anything new or unusual?”  I have been relieved to find a few people around here who ARE noticing the body aches, the dizzy and spacey feelings and the absolute exhaustion some days.  Most however give me the “look” and say nope, they feel just fine.  I have noticed that those who DO experience these symptoms are either into or open to ascension and indeed wish and long for a new world reality.  Those who don’t have the physical experiences either don’t care or are fine with the way things are.

What will happen to them?  Are they simply not here to go through this?

Who knows.  I can only answer for myself these days, right?  But at times I get a little annoyed that the most clued out seem to be just fine and think the rest of us are the crazy ones.

Oh well, so it is.  I’m happy with my role of “crazy woo woo chick”.  Who for now is going to put my body onto my massager, for heat alone is not cutting it.  Then I will be watching a QHHT video on new earth which I saw linked on one of my favorite ascension-type youtuber’s, Allison Coe, QHHT, out of Portland.  She said watching this video gave her chills and was in total alignment with what she is feeling and what her clients are sharing in the sessions.  Which, btw, when I clicked on the link to the video, it showed someone had watched it until the 20 minute mark.  I knew it wasn’t me and it turns out, it wasn’t my mate.  Another timeline we began watching it and are now to continue it?  A message of synchronicity from the Universe to begin watching there at that time?  I will share anything “cool” about that when we watch it.  I will link it later. For now, I am happy to hear there are others who are getting the same/similar messages and feelings about where we are and where we are going.

Validation is good.  Almost as good as finding that pink comfy top.  (which yes, I did find and am wearing)

That is all for now.  Much love…



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Mandela Effect In My Own House and ‘Hood


After posting the piece on our realities splitting just two days ago, which discussed things disappearing from our lives, I have had two big mandela experiences.  Both occurred yesterday.

  1. We have somehow lost a large radiator heater.  It is not in the house or garage and we have looked everywhere.  Honestly my first thought was “it’s in the new house on the new earth”, which I thought “naaah” and kept on looking.  It is not at our neighbor’s house either – where we have been known to store things at times – only this time NONE of us can recall asking him to store it – just 4 short months ago.  Zero memory of that.  I was awake last night at 3am – in a very peaceful state – and I thought of that heater and I suddenly felt as though that was a timeline that was fading.  I could feel the experience in my body.  A silly memory/experience of having a radiator-type heater in our house, which we used all last winter, was suddenly feeling as though it had happened to someone else.
  2. On my walk with my girl last night, she stopped at a driveway on a street that over the past 5 1/2 years we must have walked past hundreds of times.  There has always been two piles of arranged rocks, surrounded by black rubber, in a cut-out piece of the sidewalk on either side of the driveway.  ALWAYS been this way.  I have memories of walking my girl as a toddler and until this past year, she would always stop and want to pick up one of the rocks and take them home.  Last night?  There was only one pile on the south side.  The pile on the north is not only gone but THERE IS NO HOLE CUT OUT IN THE SIDEWALK where the rocks were.  It is literally as though the hole and the rocks never existed.  I thoroughly checked out the smooth sidewalk, looking for where maybe the homeowner removed the rocks and filled up the hole with more concrete.  Nope.  It is the original sidewalk.  I had my mate go check it out today as he found our story hard to believe.  He came back, eyes big, saying WOW!  Where did the rocks go?  Where did the hole go?  He too checked over the concrete (he used to work in a concrete lab) and he said the sidewalk is the original sidewalk and in this reality, never has there been a hole cut out of it, filled with rocks.

Which reality are we in?  More and more I am experiencing the straddling of two different timelines, certainly experiences.  More and more I feel, overall, calmer, trusting my Highest Selves to lead me.  Releasing worry. Fear.  Doubt.  Certainly more confident, solid in Who I know I Am.  I had a phone call today with my mom and noticed when I spoke of my abilities and talents I did so from a place of pure Knowing. It’s as though all of that muck is truly leaving me.  All of that energy of the stories I once believed.

What’s next?

Teleportation?  Flying?  Instant manifestation?  Instant healing?  Morph into the new earth realm?

Let’s do it!

Today’s Energies


Our Gaia is buzzing at 40hz during her peaks and the past 24 hours I have experienced this as a buzzing in my head followed up with tingling all over.  It was quite fascinating and I just lay still, allowing the experience. Today the experience showed up as some aches in my body.  A round of stretching and yoga poses helped, followed up with a 45 minute nap, where I said upon laying down “i’m not really tired ~ i’ll probably just lay here for awhile”.  Next thing I know I wake up, look at the clock and noticed almost an hour had passed.

Whatever an hour is.  I am ready to get rid of that clock.

The on-going experience of feeling as though my cells are vibrating in bursts is something I have felt a couple of times today.

I also noticed my dreams took on a new intensity last night.  I had a lot of experiences and felt I was around new Beings, seeing new faces.  The theme was activity and a lot of it.

At times I will stop what I am doing and move my arms and legs in large movements.  It’s as though the big muscles need to be moved in big ways. Also continuing to take my right hand and slide it down my left arm, removing energies no longer wanted/needed.  Then I do the same with the other arm/hand.

I am having more conversations about the concept of “new earth” with others, which I continue to feel is an earth-like planet (purely organic in form) at the next dimension.  This, I strongly felt yesterday, is this “home” in which so many of us are longing to go to/return to.  I also received the message yesterday that all is “a-go” and “ascending” to this space is a conscious choice.  When the human self is ready, it will happen. These energy events are assisting by “fine-tuning” our bodies to be “ready”.  But the idea of having to wait for something outside of ourselves – at this point anyway – is no longer necessary.

Just my perspective in this now experience.

Much love.  Much peace.  Much all that is just fun and serene and new and amazing.  



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The Universe Is ALWAYS Reminding Us We Are Not Alone


Girl, Lady, Happy, Luck, Joy, Young

I had a rather challenging afternoon.  Some conflict and old stuff and…big sigh….oh how I do not do well with drama any longer.  The desire for peaceful energies, stable reliable peaceful energies is morphing out of me, surrounding my aura, shooting all out into the vastness of the cosmos. Today I imagined this taking place and visualized the Universe saying “Send her those peaceful energies.  She is allowing for them.”  I then thanked the Universe for the blessing.

Late in the day, I took my girl over to her friends house.  I love going over to this place.  The parents are wonderful, beautiful people.  They radiate a light, a calm that I do my best not to behave like a puppy dog who wants to lap up that wonderful water.  After I dropped off my girl and headed out to leave, my girl’s little friend exclaimed that she did not want me to go.

A first.

She approached me and gave me a hug, a big tight wonderful glorious hug, which I returned.  She then looked up at me and looking me straight in the eyes in that pure way children are just naturally able to do, said she wanted me to stay forever.

Yeah, where’s the tissue, right?

Of course then my little angel had to join in and next thing I know I am being bathed in little girl sweetness.

Talk about a power surge of love.  I walked out of that house in a different space, arriving home grounded and back in my OWN energy space again.

The Universe having spoken:  You are worthy.  You matter.  You are seen.

Which deep within I already know.  But when in those moments of confusion, doubt, chaos, it can be easy to temporarily forget that.  And so for that reminder, I am deeply deeply grateful.  And from here on out, it is my intention to ONLY be around the energies of others who believe I am worthy, who believe I matter and who see me.  For anything otherwise is no longer welcome in my life.  Including my own doubts.  I am far too amazing and precious to allow for any such nonsense.

As you are too.  



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Creating A New Path for Hurricane Jose


Ok warriors and goddesses we have another hurricane needing some soothing energies.  Let’s do this again.  Focus on sending this storm system some soothing calming energies.  Keep it out at sea where it can dissipate on its own without any destruction.

I had the thought that while this may indeed be a part of a collective cleanse, when you and I do it, we do not need to harm other people, right? Doesn’t feel so good inside when we lash out so why would a storm need to do the same?

I would also add in my inner message to remove the name.  Names create more unnecessary energies when we think of male and female and the corresponding energies and behaviors.  Unless you are one who is able to be completely neutral when saying the name (I am not one who is able to do that yet), focused thought on that storm in the Atlantic heading towards the east coast is enough.

We can do this.

Much love,


Spiritual New Age Dogma


I’m going to put on the opinion hat for this one.  After seeing this surge recently of people talking about how the storms and earthquakes and wildfires were meant to cause destruction and suffering so we will continue to learn and then last night listening to a video where the person claims when all of this is over we will THANK the cabal for their technologies that caused so much destruction because we needed to have the experience that resulted from their lies and technology because it helps us grow.

Pass me the vomit bag please and then the punching bag.

Yes, I know ~ such anger and words I am expressing are not spiritually-inclined.  According to some.  I’m supposed to be all love and light right now, in all ways at all times, correct?

I guess that depends on how you define love.

I feel I am coming to this conclusion that as we continue to morph, ascend, change ~ we will all be vibing into our own realities.  I heard it explained the other night it’s like a radio station.  Whatever “station” we resonate with, vibrate to, that’s where we will Be.

(For eons we have been stuck on one station – now the bandwidth is about to explode wide open again!  Yippie!!)

Those who believe in the concept that one must experience devastation and destruction and trauma and abuse in order to know love will continue on with that journey into their own reality.  Those who believe ~ no – those who KNOW we are love and certainly do not need to experience the previous ~ who want the hell out of this prison enslavement system ~ we will be going to our own reality as well.

Yes, I hear the separation is ending.  I agree.  However, given we are One but obviously not the same, people are not going to be on the same page… and that’s ok.  People are going to be experiencing TRUE freedom resulting FROM the end of this separation game (simulated matrix system) to live and be as they choose.  I personally continue to remove beliefs.  Rules.  Expectations.  Instead I am keeping my desires simple.  I want to be free to live as I feeeeeeel in my heart while respecting other’s right to live the same.

It is that simple.  For me anyway.

I absolutely will not embrace any concept that says people must be abused, children must be kidnapped and sexually assaulted for their Soul to grow and learn.  NONSENSE.

And I wish for these otherwise well-meaning folks would stop spreading these thoughts.  They are creating fear, spreading dogma, completely discounting people’s experiences (you aren’t a victim of anything and you need to forgive your abuser because you agreed to contract with this individual to learn or whatever dogma they follow) and the people’s need to heal and lowering vibrational frequencies of Gaia.  It serves no purpose. Using their line of thinking, if we really do contract with such individuals in order to learn and grow, then we really shouldn’t interfere with these situations of abuse if we witness them or know of them, right? We should just let it all play out – the one doing the abusing and the one being abused.  They have a contract after all and need to learn a lesson (especially the one being harmed). Regardless of whether the individual is a small child.

See how insane such thinking is?

Dogma is dogma.  Programming to keep us living low and dimly instead of high and bright.  Such dogma as mentioned above is no different than the guilt-inducing, finger-pointing dogma found in the bible and inside church walls.  Doesn’t matter if it’s coming from a Buddhist Temple or a Sufi Circle.  Dogma is dogma.  And if it doesn’t resonate from the purity of Love and Kindness, I am not having it.

I for one am done with all that does not resonate with loving kindness.

I take the return of ME and my Freedom and ALL THAT I AM back again. The way I once was.

The way I know we all once were.



Going Back 18 Years


My brother sent me a copy of an e-mail I sent him back in September of 1999 ~ 18 years ago.  I had opened up to him at the time about some of the visions I held for a different world/society/way of being.  At the time I was not sure how I would go about being part of such a movement.  It is interesting to me today to see my own words, in particular my thoughts on money in which I stated I had visions for a society without money.

18 years later and I have this site and I am witnessing a mass movement away from a monetary-based society.  What a divine gift, a moment of validation for not only my own visions I am seeing manifest, but to see how those visions have remained firm in my heart all these years.  I never gave up.

And I never will.

Here is an excerpt:

really difficult for me in many ways to live in the world and do the normal thing.  work m-f.  marriage.  kids.  don’t get me wrong.  i want fulfilling work.  to marry again.  have a child.  but i’ve always felt this inner restlessness to do more – and to do it all MY way.  i completely believe and feel the thoughts and visions i’ve had can bring people together.  …  one is the elimination of money.  …  i’ve just always felt currency as we know it has got to go.  

Hurtin’ Today ~ Ouch Ouch Ouch


Backpain, Back Pain, Back, Pain

So the schumann isn’t doing anything significant – after several days of 40hz plus spikes.

Must be catch-up time for I’m feelin’ the results today.  As KP put it – these upgrades sometimes create some physical pain (!!) and it is those times to visualize releasing whatever energy is stuck there.

Also received this message this morning (private message):  Love this quote from article .. “As you clear away dross of past history karma, and traumatic wounding, your zero point vacuum initiates new cellular growth ( electrons) in its place . All of existence originates as energy waves looping in coherence, storing quantum packets of electrical charge that materializes as physical matter ( spinning atoms) the electrification of matter produces creative renewal, self- generating VITALITY HEALTH AND WELL BEING” And so it is ❤️❤️❤️


This is certainly a baby-myself day.  Heat.  Stretching. Rubbing/massaging.  Grounding/earthing.  Lots of lemon water.  Going to the pain and visualizing/tuning in to see what’s there and releasing it.

And lots of movement.  My arms and legs want to move – some of this movement punching motions.

Growing pains in this Now moment.


Trip To The Park To Soothe The Soul


So I decided to pack up the car with food, beverages, journals, phone and child to head to the park to clear my head ~ and most importantly (at the time) to be left alone in silence.

You know the saying.  Life is what happens to you when you’re busy making other plans.

We arrive and for higher reasons, other mama’s were sort of “drawn” to me for conversation.  Not a typical experience for me when visiting the park.  After a couple of rather short conversations, I headed back to the picnic bench, intending to pull out my journal and write for a time before phoning one of my favorite peeps to talk to when I’m having a moment.  Another mama had sat down at the end of the bench on the other side.  She smiled as I sat down and asked if she was taking up too much space.  No, I said, smiling back.

Well next thing I know we’re engaged in this authentic, deep conversation about life and all things REAL.  I keep thinking “she looks so familiar” and turns out she was thinking the same.  She mentions she’s an LMT and that’s when it hit me – she was the last massage therapist I saw about two years ago.  I remember at the time wanting a quiet massage but instead the two of us chatted as though we had known one another previously.

Today the conversation was no different.  It was wonderful and blissful/magical in a way.  It was the kind of authentic connecting I CRAVE and NEED.  I even found myself sharing what had been bothering me this week.  While I am a pretty open-book when I am comfortable with someone, it is completely unlike me to share such details so soon like that.

Perhaps this is part of the New Earth.  There are no rules.  No judgments. No social “norms”.  We just let ourselves BE.  Allow ourselves to BE however we feel in the moment.

I happily await the continuation of the conversation with my new friend. It helped soothe my heart that was feeling the wounds of the old programmed thoughts of my worth.  It quieted my own judgments I still hold towards others as well.  And it reminded me I am never alone.

It was…perfect.

Goin’ With The Flow ~ No Matter How The Flow Feels


Cat, British Shorthair, Grumpy, Offended

Oh, after having such a beautiful dream experience last night where I was in the new earth realm, connecting with others, absolutely no stress, no outside systems of control or power ~ waking up feeling so lovely and calm and peaceful.  The way I know I can and am desiring to.

But then stuff starts coming up.  I have had several experiences in just the last 3 days of people stepping all over my boundaries.  And yes I spoke up and asserted myself – but when does that stop trolls from making the initial intrusion?  I am quite a simple person in some ways.  I do not like intrusion or questioning.  I have stated verbally to those closest to me:  If you feel I need help or support, ask what I need.

Simple, right?

But this dynamic of some having absolutely no sense of boundaries asking their questions and when I either choose not to answer or supply an answer that isn’t of their liking, it still makes me want to fucking scream and punch someone’s lights out but good when my personal truth is not respected.  Again ~ask me what I need but never assume to know what is best or right for me.

I have been questioned about choices I am making.  I am an adult.  I am perfectly capable of communicating my needs.  I accept those who fall into the category of “family” (a term I use very lightly anymore) as they are.  It ain’t forthcoming back at me.  Again ~ want to help me?  Listen as I speak my needs.  If not, at this point in my life, shut the fuck up and go the fuck away.

The anger runs deep.  And I have to acknowledge her and give her a voice. For 48 hours I have silenced her with soothing words and by speaking thoughts of “do not let this trigger you – let it go – just let it go – we are beyond this – we KNOW the truth of who we are”.  Helps for a bit until it comes back up – this week it has come back up because I had another episode put into my experience late last night that brought up over 20 years of “stuff”.

All I can do is honor myself and let go of the new age spiritual dogma that turns a blind eye to the inner world of emotional repressed pain – or just pain alone – by using the tactic of soft silence – silencing the inner experience with pretty unicorns and love and light (false love and light).  I am completely aware of my “stuff” at this point.  I know what I need to do.  And I am also fed the fuck up with having anyone in my life who doesn’t honor me or respect me.  If you’re still knee deep in programming, especially when it comes to human relating, go away.

I feel the need to create a giant sign and wear it.  It will say something like “Old Victoria is no longer open for your business”.

In the meantime, purge this stuff, love it as I love myself.

And put on my “do not disturb grumpy cat” hat.

Onwards we go….