I read a recent piece by Kauilapele where he shares his “PITA” (pain in the ass) moments, allowing his teenager or 2 year old self to have the moment then allowing Higher Self to return.
I had to laugh. I love the authenticity of such stories. I value them. There are people who blog of ascension and they don’t share those personal moments of UGH. I wish they would.
Ascension – Remembering – any kind of self growth journey is messy at times. There are moments of purity and moments of pure mess. Kinda like my kitchen. Sometimes it is pristine, floors and counters sparkling. Other moments dishes are everywhere and somehow globs of sticky have found their way onto the floor.
Here is my authentic PITA moment of today. I am the type of Being who prefers to ease into my day. I am not one to jump out of bed, dive into activity and nor do I resonate with having company first thing ~ especially the unannounced kind. I laugh as I type this but I really deeply need and value a slow, quiet start to my day. Most days I have that.
Today was not one of them.
Our dear neighbor, who is retired, widowed and always in search of a project, came over wanting us to help him with his doorbell, which was on the fritz. I opted to stay here and get breakfast started while my mate and little one went to help him out. Somehow, don’t ask me how, I don’t know, I didn’t ask and I still don’t know, this turned into us dealing with our own doorbell issue. Next thing I know, lights are being turned on to get a close-up look of our doorbell parts. Amp meters are brought over to test ours out. Door is opening, shutting. Opening, shutting. Talking. Lots of talking. More lights need to be turned on. Then the batteries need to be checked.
Did I say there was a lot of talking going on??
Talk about sensory overload. For me. For the start of my day. I am not exaggerating. It was chaotic and overwhelming. As I’m cooking breakfast, the thought “i don’t care about the damn doorbell” kept going through my mind. Can’t it wait? Like say until 10pm when I really come alive?
I remained quiet. Calm.
After almost 40 minutes, the doorbell situations, his and ours, were resolved. At least the next plan of action for both houses had been decided. Breakfast was ready. Family sat down to eat.
Then mate and child began to talk. About doorbells.
Eyes got big. I looked at them…
…And had a 2-year-old PITA reaction.
“Can we PLEASE just have a few moments of SILENCE??!!” I said, to surprised looks by both members of my family.
The two year old was not done. She had more to say.
“I did not get my quiet this morning. I cannot DO that level of activity first thing in the morning. OK?!”
It was not one of my better moments. But I saw it for what it was. And a little while later, my state of Inner Calm had returned and I went about my day.
And so it goes…