warning ~ you are about to enter a stream of consciousness piece…
I am a bit overwhelmed at the moment ~ ok ~ a lot overwhelmed ~ at the stupidity and insanity of what humanity has created.
We are here to love one another.
We are here to connect.
We are here to create.
I was out today, walking around, talking with others. I zipped my mouth more times than I care to admit. It hurt. It was depleting.
Upon returning home, later in the day, doing dishes I was telling my mate how I checked out a friend’s twitter account. I haven’t spoken with her in over a year. Her husband decided I was not worth having in their life after he learned I was showing support for Trump. I told my mate I had the desire to write her a letter, telling her the one reason I support Trump ~ remind her I am not an evil awful horrible person. Reach out to her from the heart.
Telling my mate this, he got upset with me. Out of fear he doesn’t want me speaking politics with anyone who has deep hatred for Trump. Not in this current political climate.
I can understand that and yet again ~ what came out of my mouth was a solid loud tearful “I AM TIRED OF NOT BEING MYSELF!!”
Keeping it p.c.
Comfortable so others won’t react.
Careful so I won’t be attacked.
I don’t want to be that person.
I AM NOT THAT PERSON.
We are royally fucking up as long as we continue to point fingers, out here in la la land of the united states of amerika…point fingers at those who love hillary or love trump or hate hillary or hate trump and really WHO THE FUCK CARES?!
Can we GET PAST THIS?
Can we just get OVER our labels and affiliations and remember WHO WE REALLY ARE??
All of this makes me want to jet on outta here that much quicker.
Take me home to new earth realm NOW please!
Take me to my new earth realm where people have evolved past this petty stupid shit.
Where TRUTH is SEEN FOR ALL.
I do not belong in this energy.
I don’t play these games.
Certainly not well.
Oh, marriages have failed over politics.
Seems to me if this is the truth, the relationship was fake to begin with.
How about instead of using the term #fakenews
we use the term #fakerelationships?
Isn’t that what creates fake to begin with? People being fake? The news isn’t fake. THE PEOPLE CREATING IT ARE.
People are the fake!
We all participate in that, in one way or another.
Each time we withhold a truth.
A real desire.
WE ALL DO IT.
Can we now decide to just stop?
We all want the same thing.
Words unspoken leads to hearts broken.
“Cause we’re livin’ in a world of fools..
breakin’ us down…
When they all should let us be.
We belong to you and me.”
In other words, off on another tangent, going to my sacred tree the other day, I walk up to her, greet her, lean into her. Place my left hand on her. I stand there, silently. I look up her massive trunk. She’s so tall ~ I cannot make out the top.
“Well,” I say, “do you have a message for me?”
At that moment, a big drop of water plops on top of my head.
I giggle and can feel her giggle as well.
Tree has sense of humor.
“Good thing you didn’t do that while I was looking up at you!” I joked.
Continuing to stand there, both hands on her now, feeling her massive bark, how it is both hard and soft. Crumbly. Rough and yet smooth here and there. Cool. I don’t have to say anything out loud. She knows what I am thinking. “Can I give you anything? Do you have anything to share with me?”
She responds ~ almost motherly is her energy ~ very soft and gentle ~ a first: “Go home to your family. Get warm. Rest. There is nothing I can offer that you don’t already know. Trust. It is almost over.”
I am tired.
Did I say I was tired? lol
I reflect back on this journey, in this incarnation experience.
The moments that made me feel sick inside…
the moments where I went numb…
the moments where I aligned with a Truth that made me hug myself and cry in joy…
All of this continues.
The experiences. Awakenings. New awareness.
And yet now I feel I am ready to take a new path…
New, well, everything…
In an altogether new way.
Imagined, desired, longed for ~ oh how longed for it all is…
I could sigh a thousand sighs and cry a thousand tears…and that would only touch the energies of longing/desire I carry…
I cannot and will not do this “world of fools” experience.
I need to be let BE.
Just as you need to be let BE.
I need to let ME BE. That’s where it stars.
I want to reach down in my heart, bring out all of that LOVE and share it with everyone.
Just the way I did as a little girl, a young girl, a young woman and even today, this middle-aged woman…. and never understood the resistance I would and have received.
My ex once said “You wear your heart on your sleeve. You continue to do that, the world will crush you.”
It almost did.
And I almost listened to him.
In spite of my weariness, I am happily grateful I didn’t.
Love is all there is.
Nothing else matters.
It’s the best thing going ~ here there and everywhere.
Always has been.
Always will be.
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