Month: October 2017

sometimes i have no title.

today the word of the day is “weary”.  bone tired weary.  throat, mouth, head issues continuing.  what’s the point in talking about any of “that” though?  does it end?  switch?  i read today “you are never alone – call on creator and guides for help”.  really?  i call and get a bz signal these days.

sooooooo not into this halloween gig.  a challenge with a young child.  so we pull it together and do the trick or treating thing.

ugh.

surreal to me in a way.  i used to completely get into this day.  costume. decorations.  treats.  music.  the whole shebang.  it was once my favorite “holiday”.

today?  i could care less.  literally have zero interest in this day.

a challenge when all around you are dressed up, excited parents wanting to celebrate, giddy to take their little ones trick or treating.

again, how i used to be.

but not today.  and i mean nothing in me wants to “do” this holiday.

i have once again begun imagining this house i have seen in my dreams and visions for over 10 years.  i can feel it now so easily.  it feels like it is just “right there” off to my left or off to my right – i just need the access code or however it is i am to “get there”.  today i smelled it.  deeply felt how it “feels” to “be there” ~ feeling a part of me already is there.

i know.  it makes no sense to me.  then again nothing is making sense to me at the moment.  other than a warm bed, fire in the fireplace and quiet.

quiet.

quiet.

rest.

loads of support and abundance ~ so much so, I am overwhelmed and overjoyed at the same time.

not THAT is a feeling/experience i welcome.

that is all for now.

merry happy boo and all that ~

v.

Interestingly enough, both of them were bicyclists which made me think how much of this realm is projected holograms…

The first I experienced at the breakfast table.  I was looking out the window, watching people walk by.  I then noticed a guy on a bike ride by. I have seen him before.  He takes this route likely on his way to the University.  I go back to eating, glance up and there he is again – same guy – same bike – traveling the same direction, same side of the street.

Now that’s interesting, I thought.  When you have these experiences, after awhile, you tend to think “ok, interesting but also part of the norm these days”.

Later in the day, my girl and I head out for some errands.  As I exited the parking lot at our last location, I started to turn left as I normally do. Something told me to turn right and take the long way home.  I listened.

As I turned left up the hill to head home, I noticed a guy on a bike (again), at the stop sign at the bottom of the hill. He had on a bright red jacket and I remember his fact was quite angular.  As I head up the hill, I notice another guy coming my way on a bike, on my left.  He had on a bright red jacket and his face was angular.  Whoa, I thought – either this guy has a doppelganger or I am experiencing another timeline hop.  Or matrix glitch.

Or something else.  I don’t know what to call these things.

But I am having them.

Twice in one day today.

Anyone else watching the stars lately, having a strong impression that suddenly they’re going to start moving visibly (while I point and say “SEE I TOLD YA IT’S ALL FAKE!”)?  That began for me a few weeks ago although I also had the feeling last summer.  My mate says he’s having the same feeling/thought lately as well.

That’s all for now – “for now” being the key words.  [wp-svg-icons icon=”happy” wrap=”i”]

Victoria

A little stream of consciousness fifted from my mind earlier in the day…

***

I skimmed a piece last night on being in the void ~ that space where nothing is going on.  The space where one feels in between worlds, where one feels they have let go of old stuff and are waiting on something to come along.

In my go-to space of receiving higher stuff (my bathroom), today I received some info on that void space I feel I am in.  And others too apparently.  First to validate with a judgment – the experience sucks.

Ok, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, I thought about my child. When we organize her room, I like to make more space.  She will seem to enjoy the “more room” for awhile but then she wants to fill it up with more stuff.  She does not get this from me – I like space and clutter can send me into a tizzy.  Ok that’s interesting – as I typed the word “space” suddenly the words began to move on my screen as if in a wave formation.

Matrix glitching?  GOOD!  lol  End it!

Anyway, so I thought about my little one and received insight that I am more like her than I realize.  I do not like empty space in my mind.  When I feel I have let something go and am ready to move on, I wanna move on. YESTERDAY.  See Higher Self?  See Universe?  See this beautiful empty space I have created in my mind?  In my life?  Well come on let’s fill ‘er up again with some new experiences, people, thoughts.

Maybe part of transforming, part of “going on” is about BEING in that void.  That space of emptiness.  Nothing going on.  Nothing new to look forward to.  Nothing old to hold onto.  Just pure BEING of absolute NOTHINGNESS.  I have become used experiencing those moments of pure Being for moments here and there.  But this is different.  There is an empty feeling that I am not enjoying so much.

Ugh!

And so I own and embrace my resistance and follow my inner self which is saying the Schumann is today having a huge impact on me and my desire to DO is NIL.  When I am honest, this past week, I have not wanted to socialize.  Have not wanted new projects.  My gathering with my Shaman did not work out for this weekend and inside I was relieved.

So that’s where I am.  Typing this and sharing this was an effort so I am going to finish up and say, “until next time…”

[wp-svg-icons icon=”heart” wrap=”i”]

Victoria

p.s. ~ dinner ideas – quick and easy and healthy ~ are a bonus right now. What I wouldn’t give for a food replicator right about now…