I keep seeing and feeling this program – more and more – it intensifies – and I feel the pressure within to release my own attachment(s) to it and stand FIRM when it is being thrown at us by another.  

The Great Awakening.

Really?

Why have (allegedly) over half of the people/being’s in this realm decided to dance with the hokie “pokie”?

I can’t wrap my mind around it.

My heart certainly doesn’t understand it.

I realize though that many were forced into it (disabled, the beautiful souls in those horrid nursing homes)….

But so many who claim to be on that journey of awakening took it because they truly believe in the narrative spin on the virus.

How can you claim to be awake and hold that?

Impossible.

One of my first moments of awakening happened in my 20’s when I realized western medicine was, overall, harmful and run by grumpy old men who refused to see anything other than their (limited) training.  (Not to offend – but that was my experience – old men who were a’holes upon questioning their “expertise”).

I don’t know what to think today.  And about all I feel is this deep sense of loss – mourning – grief.  So I’m going with it.  The schumann has been blasting off and on for hours.  I can feel it somewhere within – but that “within” space is seriously clouded over with a lot of emotional pain.  However that blast that came through last night explains why I slept so deep for 7 solid hours.  As my mate said “my pillow didn’t move last night so I obviously didn’t”.

I feel weary.  Today I AM weary.

Weary of hearing the word “soon”.

Weary of endless alleged intel.

DONE with deception.

DONE with obvious liars only seeking fame and exposure.

Done with the left vs. right b.s.  BOTH PERSPECTIVES HAVE SERIOUS FLAWS (if one is Awake that is).

Done with this religious/christian perspective and the bible verses – as though that is Truth.

Quoting bible verses alienates and divides so why do it?

How about doing something, oh I don’t know, ORIGINAL?

Come up with your OWN view?

You know – stand TALL in your OWN Wisdom?

I’m just not seeing anything in which I align now.  An ongoing experience now….

….and for most of my experience here.

Do we really return to real space?

Do we get outta here?

If so – when and where?

Am I (and others like me) stuck living out an experience with those for whom I just absolutely don’t jive?

Some answers would be very helpful.  (POWER UP INNER SELF and SHARE)

That’s all I have atm.  Thank you for the new donator’s.  Keep them coming.  This work I do is getting more challenging.  A little love and motivation helps keep me going.

Love,

V.

******

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I have had one of those days where nothing aligns – not fully that is.  The spiritual war and the waiting for things to shift so we can (fill in the blank) weighs on us in this house.  Each day I make the attempt to remember to speak words of how we are doing our best….how amazing we all are….how we are protected and guided….and how the change we seek is coming – the intentions we hold are manifesting…..

But some days – some moments – none of these words are soothing or enough.  When our girl just won’t listen or do chores without being told repeatedly or when she can’t find any other children to play with and when the friends she REALLY wants to play with still aren’t being allowed to play WITH her because the virus fear is still rampant in this city even after most received the j (and then there’s that issue with the shedding going on that has created another level of stress for us all)….and when papa bear falls or has to catch himself on something because his ability to walk is a huge challenge not just due to physical but cognitive issues and pain levels are just too much for him to take at times….and when mama bear’s mind blips out and she can’t remember a dayem thing or can’t keep up with all of the things she hash to do and suddenly she has to run to the bathroom, close the door and cry because her exhaustion level with it ALL comes crashing down and she just wants a real friend to hold her as she just lets it all go……well no one in this house is thriving in the way he/she seeks/desires/NEEDS….and today I had a moment of E N O U G H!

So I reached out on an alleged spiritual awakening group in search of some mama’s who could relate to my challenges I face and received mostly (useless) advice when I was looking for love and support – and I even had some questioning of my situation (words of judgment as to how I could actually be having this particular struggle as one individual’s own adult children didn’t struggle in the same way).

Fuck this, I thought – left the conversation, unfollowed the group.  New Age Spiritual b.s. in my face.  No thank you!  Done with fakery.  I need some love and authenticity.

Then I see this and say “THIS is the answer”.  This is how it’s done when someone is needing some Love and Attention.  

Hold Space.  Ask what is needed.  Words so often just get in the way.

So simple.  Together we rise.  Together, we heal.  I really wish humanity would get this one right.

Love,

Victoria

This song began going through my mind and heart last night.  We are there now – at the end – keep going.  NEVER SURRENDER.  Lyrics below too – which are absolutely aligning with Who We Are and what our END GOAL is.  And those opening lyrics “A little more time we’re asking for” – felt – for me – to be US on the outside asking us for just a little more time – keep going – never surrender.  Game – movie – war – whatever it is – I WANT MY FREEDOM.