Putting Together A Puzzle Piece on my Empathic Self

 

My emotions have been all over the place for awhile now.  I read lately that empaths may be having an especially difficult time now as we pick up on the energies of the collective.

Yeah, I thought, that is part of it.  But I knew something else was missing.

Earlier today I thought back to my childhood.  I loved to watch the NBA Finals as a child ~ that and the World Series.

I remembering feeling intense emotions.  For the winning team, I would feel chills.  My eyes would swell up in tears.  Emotions of pride and accomplishment were powerful within my little body.

Then I would think of the losing team and I would vacillate to the other end of the emotional spectrum.  I felt such deep sadness.  Grief.  The sense of loss and disappointment was huge.  More tears would overcome me.  Each emotion was so damn real to me ~ it left me confused.

I can remember watching certain news stories over the years of people who had committed crimes.  Even those engaging in the most horrible of acts, once they were captured, I would feel the flood of relief for the families. And then, I would naturally slip into feeling such sadness for the perpetrator.  The sense of regret and loss.  “What a waste of a life,” I would think, trying to understand the heavy emotions I was feeling.

I’m still this way today.  As  child I didn’t speak of it.  I thought I was “weird” for experiencing such strong and opposing emotions.  Today I know different.  Today I have a “label” and an explanation.

I reflect on the term “opposing emotions”.

Are they really opposing?  Or are they just energetic experiences that result when I sense emotions from others ~ all on one spectrum?

I could speak of this some more I am sure but for now I am EXHAUSTED from processing all of this emotional junk ~ that I know is part mine/in here – and part out there.  So time for some much needed rest and TLC.

Peace ya’ll.  I feel we are at peak point.  Relief, soon.

Victoria