Category: Daily Notes

7.9.25 ~ End of day Headlines/Finds and a Share

 

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Enjoying an early evening drive out, I was reflecting on where things are.  Just feeling into it all.  Suddenly I was struck by the fact that the left, who is demanding loudly for the release of the Epstein files, is not interested in the children.  They’re demanding in the manner they are because they believe Trump is on it – want him on it – anything to remove him.

I suddenly felt disheartened.

If this were about the children they would have been speaking up demanding justice back in 2019/2020 when Epstein was first arrested.

But did they?

Nope.

They were silent.

Today?  Now that they think they finally have that golden ticket to remove Trump because they believe he’s on the list?

They’re loud.  And vocal.  Are any of them actually talking about the children?  That is what I want to know.  Want to see!

They need to be shown who is really on that list – how many of their “leaders” they worshipped and adored are on it.  And who is behind it all.  Yes, we all need to see the totality of the truth, but these people are going to need to be brought to their knees in a moment of humble.

Maybe we all do, for it would not surprise me if Trump is on that list.  Although I don’t feel he is, nothing surprises me that is presented to us as truth.  And I hold no attachment to any of the actors on stage.  Aside from John Kennedy as in if it were shown he was part of it, that would give me a pretty good “omg no way!” moment.  For now – they’re all fair game.  One big club separate from us all, some sold out, some pretended to go along, others just did and remained quiet, made deals, etc.

It’s a movie of show and tell while wars seen and unseen have been battled.  We’re being shown scenes from both sides, trying to figure out who is good and who is not.  And it isn’t until the end of a movie where you are shown who is who.  And as for me, I am not a fan of movies, tbh – unless I can just sit back and be entertained and humored from the heart without having to guess who is who.  I N E V E R did like movies like that.

Which is just one reason why I moan and gripe as much as I do.  So very little resonates with me in all of this.

Here’s what I’m seeing tonight.

💖

Victoria

*********

 

This AI stuff is really being shown for its nefarious purpose quickly now:

AI is learning to lie, scheme, and threaten its creators – Insider Paper

In one particularly jarring example, under threat of being unplugged, Anthropic’s latest creation Claude 4 lashed back by blackmailing an engineer and threatened to reveal an extramarital affair.

Meanwhile, ChatGPT creator OpenAI’s o1 tried to download itself onto external servers and denied it when caught red-handed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Then this:

 

Ok this one makes me think wtf?  Screwworm?  Just wait.  Someone will say this parasite flourishes because of climate change – no beef for you!  Still – this one is eeewww egads!  Could be signaling the need for local/made in the USA beef (for people IN the USA).

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Brazil too making it 7 today:

 

weather:

 

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Selected preliminary Storm Total Rainfall in inches from 800 AM
EDT Sat Jul 05 through 400 AM EDT Tue Jul 08...

...DELAWARE...
MARYDEL 1 E                          2.18                    
REDDEN                               1.16                    

...MARYLAND...
CAMBRIDGE                            2.59                    
TRAPPE 5 SE                          2.08                    

...NEW JERSEY...
SPART                                2.57                    
BRIDGEWATER                          1.06                    

...NORTH CAROLINA...
PITTSBORO 8.8 NNE                   11.53                    
HILLSBOROUGH 8.4 NNW                10.49                    
CHAPEL HILL 5.9 SW                  10.05                    
MEBANE 3.0 SSW                       9.73                    
HURDLE MILLS 5.2 NNW                 9.15                    
DURHAM 4.6 WNW                       8.46                    
BURLINGTON 3.9 NNW                   8.01                    
GRAHAM 2 ENE                         7.78                    
BOOKER CREEK NEAR CHAPEL HILL        7.27                    
CASTLE HAYNE 1.6 NNW                 4.36                    
WILMINGTON 2.8 SE                    4.12                    
LELAND 4.3 WSW                       3.78                    
WRIGHTSBORO 2.9 ENE                  3.73                    
SMITH CREEK 0.8 E                    3.35                    
BURGAW 5.3 WSW                       3.29                    
FAYETTEVILLE                         3.04                    

...PENNSYLVANIA...
GLENMOORE                            1.42                    
BUCKINGHAM                           1.34                    

...SOUTH CAROLINA...
LONGS 1.3 NW                         4.82                    
LITTLE RIVER 4.7 WNW                 4.15                    
NORTH MYRTLE BEACH 1.8 E             4.03                    
CONWAY 10.4 ENE                      3.42                    
LORIS 1.5 ENE                        3.20                    
MYRTLE BEACH 9.2 WSW                 3.02                    

...VIRGINIA...
TUBERVILLE 3 E                       7.03                    
VIRGILINA 6.2 N                      4.67                    
DANVILLE                             2.81                    
PAMPLIN 1.6 NNE                      2.65                    

...Selected preliminary Peak Wind gusts in miles per hour earlier
in the event...

...NORTH CAROLINA...
HUNTINGTON SP JETTY                    52                    
FRYING PAN SHOALS BUOY                 49                    
SOUTHPORT                              48                    
SUNSET BEACH BUOY                      47                    
OAK ISLAND                             43                    
FEDERAL POINT                          42                    
JOHNNIE MERCER PIER                    41                    
WILMINGTON                             40                    
LOCKWOODS FOLLY INLET                  39                    

...SOUTH CAROLINA...
SPRINGMAID PIER                        56                    
WFXB-TV                                54                    
WINYAH BAY                             51                    
NORTH MYRTLE BEACH                     48                    
CAPERS NEARSHORE BUOY                  47                    
CHARLESTON TIDE GAGE                   47                    
FOLLY BEACH                            43                    
WATIES CAUSEWAY 1                      42                    
LAKE ARROWHEAD                         39

 

Betelgeuse is – dimming….dimmest phase so far.  They do this right before BOOM:

Why Betelgeuse Is Dimming,and What It Means for the Future of Our Sky?

Betelgeuse, the red supergiant that marks Orion’s shoulder, has entered its dimmest phase in recorded history, sparking global speculation. Could this be the final countdown before the star goes supernova? Or is it just another dramatic turn in the life of a massive, aging star? Located about 640 light-years from Earth, Betelgeuse is large enough to end its life in a colossal supernova,an explosion so bright it could outshine the full Moon and be visible in daylight for months. But for now, astronomers are left watching and wondering. This video explores the science behind Betelgeuse’s fading glow, including its multiple overlapping brightness cycles and unusual variability. Its recent drop to magnitude 1.12 marks the lowest point in over 50 years of observation. What’s behind this change? Possible culprits include giant surface convection cells, natural pulsations, and dust clouds created by intense stellar winds. We also look at how scientists might detect a supernova before it happens. Neutrinos,ghost-like particles released in a star’s final moments,could give us hours of warning. Systems like IceCube and the Supernova Early Warning System are on constant alert. So is Betelgeuse about to explode, or are we witnessing a cosmic false alarm? Either way, its unpredictable behavior gives us rare insight into the life and eventual death of massive stars.

 

 

Antarctica:

Early stratospheric warming waves emerging around Antarctic polar vortex – The Watchers

 

Feeling Safe is everything.  💖

 

Image via my green dream / Conner white

 

Australia | Photography by Ross Schram

 

May be an image of twilight

 

May be an image of the Cotswolds

 

May be an image of living room and hearth

 

May be an image of bedroom

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7.9.25 ~ Puzzle piecing……….Art of War…..Checking in with the feeeeeeeeeeels

 

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Exhausted.

’nuff said about that.

Thinking how much this is about inside – innerstanding – as i thought that word i thought of another channel – a flower channel – who told someone not to use that word.  At the time it rather scared me as i was under a wee bit of a cult spell myself – but today – it is the INTENTION we put into our words we use that matter.  And going within – going to the INNER – is how we do indeed “get it”.  The Kingdom is within – that one verse that stayed with me since I was a young girl.  For a reason.  And “under”standing can refer to the underworld.  Inner is the Kingdom.  The REAL truth.  So – innerstanding it is.

Seeing from a Higher Perspective.  It’s a challenge – I get it.  But seeing things as our eyes see them leads to frustration.  Which I get.  The whole “release the list” thing – I keep coming back to Crimes Against Children Unites Humanity.  In this case, both sides need unite to demand that entire domino unravel and collapse and be SEEN.  Undeniably.  Left and right – demanding the release – united as one voice.  That is what we have.  And it is in that file release that Is ra el and Moss ad and See Eye A comes to light and their horrific crimes on all of us.  “their” wars, money schemes, controls, etc.

Here are the finds at this moment.

💖

Victoria

 

 

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Keep hearing the word “forces” – thought attention forces the something – lol – sorry I am tired and can’t recall – something about attention forces the question – so i type in force and see this one – not what i was after – but i feeeeeeeeeeeeeels on this one is where we are.  sometimes we have a precise delta date – most of the time not:

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If you can watch this – you will want to.  Check out what Trump touches as he walks off stage……World Cup Trophy – at least it’s presented as that – but that thing is gold and as I’ve said, it looks like the object in Contact – that transported Ellie out of this reality via wormholes.

 

unredacted version of the little black book:

 

from some time ago – but he’s always known.  gotta remind myself Trump is not the one in charge – just playing his role:

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Few other finds:

 

 

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Earth minerals:

 

Remember to do this:

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7.5.25 ~ Other Headlines/Finds including scientific study showing the water in our body is H3O2

 

The Italian Dolomites

 

 

 

“their” system created this:

 

 

This is brilliant.

The 1st
@GalacticJack
Want to learn about the WATER in YOUR BODY?
Here you go… THE WATER IN YOUR BODY ISN’T H2O.
IT’S H3O2.
AND THAT CHANGES EVERYTHING.
They lied to you about water.
Not just about the fluoride-filled tap water or the overpriced stuff in plastic bottles—but about the water inside your body.
The water in your cells, your blood, your fascia, your organs.
The water you’re made of.
They told you it was H2O. We all learned that in school. That your body is 70% water and that water is just a neutral fluid that transports things around.
But that’s not the full story.
Not even close.
Inside your body, water doesn’t exist in its ordinary liquid state. It forms a structured phase—a living, intelligent, electrically charged form called H3O2.
It’s known as exclusion zone water, or EZ water, and it behaves completely differently than standard liquid water.
Dr. Gerald Pollack, a bioengineer and researcher at the University of Washington, proved this in groundbreaking studies.
He discovered that near hydrophilic (water-loving) surfaces—like the lining of your blood vessels and cells—water organizes into a crystalline structure.
It becomes thicker, more viscous, negatively charged, and capable of storing energy. It works like a battery. It captures energy from sunlight, infrared heat, and vibrations. It drives flow. It fuels biological processes. It exists in plants, animals—and most of all, in you.
This discovery rewrites the rules of biology.
Pollack’s experiments showed that EZ water expands when exposed to infrared light and generates measurable electrical voltage.
It can move fluids without a pump.
His findings have been published in peer-reviewed journals, backed by real experiments, and even compiled in a full book called The Fourth Phase of Water.
None of this is theory.
It’s scientifically validated.
But it’s been ignored.
Why?
Because if people truly understood how vital structured water is, they’d realize how easy it is to heal—without chemicals, injections, or prescriptions. ⸻
H3O2 IS WHAT MAKES LIFE POSSIBLE
Your blood doesn’t circulate just because your heart pumps like a machine. Your cells don’t function solely on pressure gradients and chemical reactions.
What powers the flow, the energy, the communication inside your body—is the structured water in your tissues.
This water builds charge and helps move things to where they need to go. That’s how blood flows in early embryos before a heart has even formed. That’s how fascia conducts light and vibration.
That’s how cells communicate—not just chemically, but through electrical fields.
Over a hundred years ago, Rudolf Steiner said the heart wasn’t a pump, but a valve in a system already in motion.
Dr. Pollack delivered the experimental evidence for that idea.
Viktor Schauberger studied water in its natural state and claimed it was the key to understanding life itself.
Yet no one teaches this. Not in medical school. Not in mainstream science. Not in your doctor’s office. Because structured water can’t be bottled, patented, or sold as a subscription. ⸻
HOW TO BUILD STRUCTURED WATER IN YOUR BODY
You won’t get structured water from the tap. That’s dead water—chemically treated, energetically flat, and often filled with toxins. You build structured water inside you by exposing yourself to real life force. •
You need sunlight. Infrared light from the sun is one of the strongest triggers for EZ water formation. That’s why you feel more energized after sunbathing or walking in natural light—it literally charges you up. •
You need movement and breath. Your fascia and muscles help fluid move through your body. Breathing expands the diaphragm, increases flow, and stimulates the lymphatic system. All of this supports structure and charge. • You need electrolytes and minerals. Spring water, Celtic sea salt, and shilajit all contribute to better hydration and conductivity. Real hydration isn’t about drinking more water—it’s about making that water usable at the cellular level. •
You need raw fruits and vegetables. Plants already contain structured water. That’s why you feel instantly refreshed after eating watermelon, cucumber, or fresh juice. Their water is already alive. •
You need grounding. Walking barefoot connects you to the Earth’s natural electrical field. This stabilizes your internal charge and supports structured water. •
You need clean energy. Your thoughts, music, frequencies, and intentions all matter. Water responds to vibration. Masaru Emoto’s workshowed that water can store memory and respond to emotion and sound. ⸻
They told you to fear the sun. They told you water is just water. They sold you dead water in plastic, laced with BPA and xenoestrogens. They filled your home with WiFi and blue light that scrambles biological signals. They made you think fatigue, dehydration, inflammation, and brain fog are normal. They’re not. You weren’t designed to run on chemicals, sugar, or caffeine. You were made to run on light, minerals, breath, and energy. And the bridge that connects all of those? Structured water. ⸻
YOU’RE NOT MADE OF FLUID. YOU’RE MADE OF LIVING WATER. You’re not a machine. You’re not just flesh and bones and blood. You’re a living battery—a vibrating, self-charging liquid being powered by sunlight, breath, and movement.
  • So the next time you feel drained, don’t ask which supplement you need. Ask how charged your water is.
  • Sunlight is medicine.
  • Movement is energy.
  • Fruit is hydration.
  • Grounding is alignment.
  • Breath is electricity.
Your body already knows how to heal.
All you have to do is give it the conditions it was designed for.
—Adapted from the work of Esta Koke
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7.2.25

 

Hmmm.  Checking in.  No responses today.  Do I get louder or just let it go?  Well…. as I told a friend today it’s like there’s a trough able to feed 500 but you have 5000 in need of it.  Survival of the fittest and fastest and most creative.  So be it.  I will do whatever it takes to climb into my new life.

I could express how I feel about today’s court case – but does it make a difference?  Is anything we are intending making a difference?  Is it part of the plan?  Showing us – yet again – how corrupt and evil and narcissistic the court system is?

Hmm?

Any solid answers?

 

 

Well at least this monster failed – again:

BREAKING: Republicans Fail to Advance Trump’s ‘Big Beautiful Bill’ After Four GOP Votes No — Here Are the Four Republicans Who Sank It | The Gateway Pundit | by Jim Há´ft

These are the four Republicans who voted no on advancing Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill:

  • Rep. Keith Self
  • Rep. Andrew Clyde
  • Rep. Victoria Spartz
  • Rep. Brian Fitzpatrick

 

Ratcliffe Declassifies CIA Documents – Reveals Comey, Brennan, and Clapper Purposely Corrupted Trump-Russia Investigation and Included Discredited Steele Dossier to Take Down Trump Despite Knowing It Was a Phony Report | The Gateway Pundit | by Jim Hoft

 

Well we were told “THERE WILL BE FIREWORKS”.  Second or third “incident” this week:

 

This movie has some of the most absurd scenes…….

 

 

strange………..either total matrix fuchery or outside comms………..almost like the concept that we have real body on outside playing out through our avatar here………..really wake up, you know?

 

Waiting on that solar moment?  We got this.  I know it’s new evidence of an old event – but the timing is intriguing:

AI Overview
In July 2025, astronomers confirmed the first visual evidence of a double-detonation supernova.This discovery, made by examining the supernova remnant SNR 0509-67.5, revealed two concentric calcium rings, indicating a double explosion. The findings, published in Nature Astronomy, suggest that white dwarf stars can explode earlier than previously thought, potentially impacting how we understand Type Ia supernovae and the expansion of the universe.

 

Feb. 29 1960………..

 

 

 

 

 

Really trying to stay out of this one………….do we get angry or do we trust some benevolent process behind it?

 

 

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Image via mybluedream

 

Canadian Rockies:

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Yosemite Valley California photographer Casey Horner

 

Photography by Gabe Hobbs

 

Switzerland 🇨🇭 photographer Milosz Roman

 

 

My work is not just a blog of news finds, my insights and reflections and other tidbits – it’s been a movement since its inception in 2016.  Since then, I have been dedicated to delivering news and insights about the Great Awakening.  I rely on your generosity to keep running and providing valuable content. Your financial support will help cover hosting, research, and content creation costs to ensure we continue spreading awareness. Please donate today to help sustain my mission.  Thank you.

 

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Raising Funds For My Daughter

 

 

She is in need of a haircut, school curriculum and clothes for this fall (she keeps growing!).

I’m busting my ass here working on my two sites while I continue my exploration into returning to school.  I finally made one connection yesterday – that’s a process – have to go through an assessment – then that gets approved then I get to work with someone who will help me.  The other connection – I am not hearing back from them in spite of numerous attempts on my end.  Also waiting back to hear from another person, who bumped my case up to her supervisor as it was clear to her I was not getting the assistance I am in need of.

For now – here I am doing my best when I just want to stay in bed these days.

Thank you to all for your support.

💖

Victoria

 

And remember I also now offer tarot card reads, which you will find on the main page, top left side of the menu.

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Question

 

Are any of you SEO experts?  I have a new SEO program here and have done all I can with it.  I am meeting myself where I am – which is I am in no cognitive position to teach myself.  Not to mention time.  I have so many irons out there, I need someone doing this for me.  Please let me know if you would be interested in helping me out.  Maybe we can barter.  I’m open.

💖

Victoria

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Hershey to remove artificial dyes by 2027.

 

 

So RFK tells us that Hershey will be removing artificial food dyes – by 2027.

Twenty.

Twenty.

Seven.

Supporters are saying “americans don’t want ugly food.

🙄

So appearance over health………..

As Forrest Gump said:  Stupid is as stupid does.

What about the child slave labor that Hershey’s has used to make their toxic filth?

What about the heavy metals found in their chocolate?

What about holding them accountable for the DECADES of poisoning the population WITH their products?

Every single corporation needs to be stripped of their assets – held accountable for crimes against humanity.

If not – if this doesn’t happen this year – this awakening is nothing but a flop.

And the vaxxine poisoning?

People saying we don’t want to scare the parents too much.

Oh sure….. just prioritize the mental health of the parents over the lives of the children.

What happened to THIS IS ABOUT THE CHILDREN?

When I see how this is playing out, I fail to see the proof that the children are truly being prioritized.

Think Jesus would ever consent to “ok let’s clean this up and show people but we will do it very slowly.  sure there will be a lot of collateral loss – but hey – we have to prioritize the minds of the programmed masses”.

Yeah I don’t think so.  It would be frequency change NOW.  All see NOW with supportive help from the outside to ensure the mind survives.

I mean how many of us have had trauma after trauma of unexpected events and survived?

If a woman can survival a sexual assault and have her mind still intact….

If a child can survive being molested and still have their minds intact……..

Harmed, yes, but still intact, then it’s obviously clear to me that some normie can handle hearing the stuff they are putting into their children’s bodies is harming them.

I mean what parent wouldn’t freak and say WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME EARLIER WHEN YOU KNEW??

Anything is possible, right?

For every theory, I have a question.

How many children are now homeless because the plan allowed the cost of living to skyrocket?

How many were harmed with the covid jab because again, this was allowed to happen?  (people say “parents had a choice” – what about the children?  they had NO CHOICE)

The longer this drags on without anything significantly positive – that we all NEED – the more I can’t help but feel we’ve been duped.  There is no “home”.  There is no “event” coming to get us out and/or change this reality.  No arrests we can see.  We will remain trapped inside of this pit watching a movie that doesn’t appear to truly be going anywhere useful and helpful.  Needed.

And then I learned this:

Earnings from $TRUMP Meme CoinThe $TRUMP meme coin, launched on January 17, 2025, has generated significant revenue for Trump-affiliated entities through trading fees and token ownership. Here’s a breakdown based on available information:

  • Trading Fees: Entities behind the $TRUMP coin, including CIC Digital (a Trump-owned company) and Fight Fight Fight LLC, have earned substantial fees from transactions. Estimates suggest:

    • Between January 17 and January 30, 2025, these entities accumulated approximately $86 million to $94 million in trading fees, according to blockchain analysis firms Merkle Science and Chainalysis.

All while good people who support him (or don’t – it doesn’t matter does it – he is there to represent ALL OF US) – go without.  Lose their homes.  Sleep in tents and in RV’s.  Slowly starve.  And then some Trump supporters have been coming after me lately, criticizing me for asking for financial help through my work.  Or tell me “we are doing this for the normies – we have to help them” and yet have ANY ONE OF THEM HELPED MY DAUGHTER OR ME?

Nope.

FAKE people.

I mean SERIOUSLY.

S E R I O U S L Y.

How does this make sense?

Hmm?

What world am I in?!

Today is one of those days where nothing makes sense.  And where distraction isn’t working.  Self-talk – soothing techniques – helps a wee bit but does not shift that inner part of ME that wants the fuch out of this reality of evil.  I can look the other way to distract myself, but I always KNOW.

You know?

Do your best when in a prison that poisons you and requires you to pay ungodly amounts of their money to survive.

Yeah, that option of distraction is no longer acceptable.

The only way one will feel better and stay in that state is to get out of prison.

💖

Victoria

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7.1.25 ~ Busting into July with some Finds ~ Original Elon getting “X”posed. Some woo woo. And personal sleuthing…

 

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They are pathetic…………can vouch for that……….

 

When out, my mama eyes are on a constant swivel………

 

The reason why the acceptant rate is so low for american students at these “prestigious” universities is because 1/4-1/3 or more of their enrollment are from foreign students.

 

7/11 was in my space first thing today……….

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And the double 8’s:

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This guy speaks my language:

 

So, Nixon ended the gold standard to give the finger to Europe – which is why “they” had him removed……….

 

Q’s?

 

 

 

the newly “elected” ny mayor:

 

 

 

4 second video:

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Remember when I theorized BB getting arrested here on american soil?  What if (this was part of the plan – to get his trial delayed so he is brought over here)………?

 

Picture submitted by Alexey Murzin

 

Switzerland 🇨🇭 photographer Milosz Roman

 

My work is not just a blog of news finds, my insights and reflections and other tidbits – it’s been a movement since its inception in 2016.  Since then, I have been dedicated to delivering news and insights about the Great Awakening.  I rely on your generosity to keep running and providing valuable content. Your financial support will help cover hosting, research, and content creation costs to ensure we continue spreading awareness. Please donate today to help sustain my mission.  Thank you.

 

CASHAPP:  $VictoriaT1144

Here are other ways to support my work:

💥BRAND NEW OFFERING OF MINE💥

Tarot Card Readings ⋆ LOVE IN ACTION NOW

 

1. You can support me at my other page where I share my personal musings, music and photography:  Victoria T is creating Intuitive Reflections of the world around me…. (buymeacoffee.com)

2.  My inter-active Journal, “Live To Impress Yourself†on sale at AMAZON.

3.  I am also an affiliate for BlueHost.  If you or someone you know are interested in starting/creating a website and are in need of a hosting company, check out BlueHost. It’s who I use, and I have always found them very helpful from setup to assistance. Click on the previous link to get yourself set up!

 

And…..Please find and follow me on the following platforms. 💜💥💖

Substack

Telegram

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

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Gab

Truthsocial

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Medium

Greatawakening.win  

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Checking in with the Energies and FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELS

 

I’ll tell you this much – it is feeling very quiet here now.  Lonely.  One of the accounts on twatter said that it seems like most of what is here are NPC’s and narcissists.

Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeels on that.

NPC’s are, imho, soulless vessels put here to keep the game going and to go after us in order to instill fear so that we don’t rise up in our Truth and Power and energetically bust the code.

Narcissists are those who are still running completely or largely on the matrix code, which in and of itself as I have said repeatedly, IS narcissistic.  They are still not seeking or creating the space for their own healing.  And I have seen for myself, if we’re not doing that, that narc program will rush in and take over the God Code.

I am also sensing time in June creeping by more and more slowly as the month went on.  Others are saying the same.  The last time this was experienced to this level of sloooooooooooooooow was back in January, which was when Trump was inaugurated again.  That tells me the matrix did not want him to take the helm again, and that SOMETHING is set to switch as we go into July.  I feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeels this.

Until next time….

💖🎶

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Reflecting On the Awakening

 

In my email box this morning was a link to a chat going on through Quora talking about INFJ’s.  Meyers-Briggs personality test that includes a variety of personality types, INFJ’s being the rarest.  As a fellow INFJ’er – going back to the time I first took the full-length test back in the early 90’s – I was curious to read other people’s perceptions.  Words used to describe this type by others in the chat:

Unusual.

Cool.

In tune with God.

Truthseeker.

That last one stayed with my body, who had some words to say.

It has not felt safe for me to tell the truth.

Going way back to when I was small, to tell the truth often meant going against tradition, be it with family, peers (rather done using the term friend for those who don’t stick around – peers come and go – friends stay with us), school, church.  And my experience was when I did that, I’d get in trouble.  Yelled at.  Criticized.  Bullied/teased.  “Always sticking her foot in her mouth” is still an old childhood little wound put there by a family member who was addicted to the status quo.

These experiences continued on into present time.  I know who wants to keep me in line.  I know when someone is playing passive aggressive games with me.  I know that when I disagree with someone and present a different perspective and they change the subject, the connection has been severed, and I move on.  I am not here to keep anyone comfortable and under the illusion of being safe.

I am here to be ME.

To break those spells.

Not to go along with them.

That is simply not who I am.

Obviously.

But I went along with it anyway for it felt SAFER to my body to do so.

At least that part that of my nervous system whose focus is to keep me alive.

But sometimes being “alive” in that way doesn’t indicate WELL.

REALLY alive.

For to be REALLY alive IS to tell your own truth.

To speak out when that inner feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeler says to do so – when it says, “this isn’t right”.

Even if you’re shaking.

Even if your nervous system is saying “uh NOO DO NOT SAY THAT TOO SCARY SCARY”.

Part of this Awakening is seeing not just the lies and deception of this place, but to see all of the lies I told myself.

Those many times I deceived myself.

The lies spoken to keep the peace.  “It’s ok.  I’m fine.  I’m sorry.”

The times I refused to look at myself in the mirror, not wanting to see I just betrayed myself.

Again.

Even to this day when I do my work here, sometimes I hesitate to say something because of fear.   Fear of losing readers.  Fear that the matrix will come with its b.s.  Fear that even as I SAY that last part, people will think “ok she’s crazy.”

It’s happened.

But I know the journey to healing begins by telling the truth.  MY truth.

And as an INJR’s – as a sensitive type (HSP) – it is in my code – my DNA – my energetic imprint of WHO I AM to tell the truth.  That voice comes from deep within and nudges me to SEE.  To QUESTION.  To SPEAK and SHARE.  And it is in that energetic code within to SEE things others don’t.  Sense.  Smell even.  There are many hidden dimensions around us here.  Some of us are better able to sense them is all.

If we are to TRULY have an organic experience of awakening here, it starts with each of us carrying that TRUTH code – that truth ENERGY – with us.  Every day.  All the time.  With confidence.  With KNOWING.

Be true to thyself is far deeper in its energetic truth than just some fancy words put on a bumper sticker.

Spoken and shared with true intention, which at least for me, requires me to step back from that initial nudge to share/speak, go within and bring my body and nervous system along.  To build that sense of Safety again – to change the definition of what Safety REALLY is – to remember I AM GOD SOURCE EMBODIED.  Words cannot define it – it’s a feeeeeeeeeeel.

A knowing.

Ancient.

Eternal.

Again – no words.

Just a knowing – which requires no words to understand.

💖

Victoria

 

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