Category: Uncategorized

i’m still someplace else today – more than i was yesterday.  in the new i am definitely having much more of a family tribe.  being a parent – for both my mate and i – has become extremely difficult.  energy to keep up just is not there.  making it through the day and just coming up with an idea for dinner plus prepping it – well that’s a “success” to me these days.  and i’m damn tired of it.  i want to feel alive and well again and be fully functioning.  these incoming plasma energies (below) are really impacting this body.  still engaged in my 7pm naps – and i don’t want to get out of the bed when i do awaken.

tonight as i was half awake cooking dinner i said out loud to no one in particular – ok if you take one more piece of this energy of mine within i am going to have to live in bed.

how some can feel AMAZING right now – well i am not having that experience.  that isn’t because i don’t feel amazing changes are taking place and that we are right there on that door step just waiting – feeling that so deeply in my body – it’s just the PROCESS of this – whatever “this” is – is it ascension as some say?  it is a true escape from an energy prison?  whatever “this” is – at this point – feeling amazing and liberated and light and free is NOT my experience.  i want to scream with frustration at how fucking tired i am.

if i am around any sort of conflict or drama – i walk away.  just walk away girl, i tell myself now.  walk away.  cannot and will not participate.  just let others BE.

i had an image come to me today – in terms of this political stuff/change. we have had this beautiful table full of spoiled food (disguised as healthy). do we want the rotten food cleared and the table cleaned before we are gifted with the real stuff?  of course.  the table is being cleaned.  that is where i see things are at.

other feels that continue – Kennedy Jr. will be the one to reveal the truth to the dem/left supporters.  potus cannot pull that off by himself.  their programming is far too deep.  that is unless this massive cosmic experience we call the Event does it.  that is possible too.

for now if i had the luxury i would simply be sleeping.  ordering take out. stocked up on frozen meals.  eating healthy (home cooked, fresh, etc.) is not making a difference – at least not much of one – so ease is becoming top priority.  stretching.  head pressure is here.  congestion.  in a nutshell, i am a tired pecan who is done with this 3D experience.

speaking of the dimensional speak ~ tuning in to the Source within me – as much of Source is actually in these current body models – if I were Pure Source Love – would I want all of my creation scattered in different dimensions?  no way.  i’d want everyone at my big table.  sure you can go join in with your own little tribes and groups but division where you aren’t allowed to visit other tribes?  NO WAY.

relief.  release.  relaxation.  and for now – doing some light detoxing.  not feeling like eating much.

off to stretch, do a few rounds on the punching bag, then watch the JFK jr. special although i have no expectations of that and may not watch the entire program.

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victoria

well not that i have moments like this every day but we thought it was significant.  my mate has been buying BIC lighters for decades.  today we picked up a package at the store and upon bringing them home, noticed something new – tiffany blue (picture below).  as he said he has never seen that color before.  he put it on the mantle and said he would not be using it.  i added “we will use it for the right moment”.  at the grand reveal we will light it in his honor ~ and his father’s.

on to the next share.  i have been seeing people i know – and haven’t seen for some time – and have suddenly very recently wanted to see recently – ALL WITHIN THE LAST 24 HOURS.  this includes one woman i haven’t seen in YEARS and saw her today at the store.  it was wonderful just to say hi and catch up a bit. there has to be a reason for this.  my mate says maybe it’s one last connection – a need to create that one last moment – before the transition. a good-bye of sorts perhaps.  whatever the reason, smiles and hugs ensued and for that ~ i am grateful.  when we get past our stories and labels, we really are all One.  Connected.

and on we go to the last share….i had another Trump dream.  new subscribers won’t know this but i have had dreams of president’s going back to Clinton.  each dream has proven accurate as to their true nature/character.  i had one of clinton, one of bush and two of obama. (and yes i did not enjoy any of those dreams).

Trump?  i’ve lost count.  each one though has shown his character to be honest.  fearless.  and indeed in command.  each dream has been purely enjoyable and comforting.  as i can recall in most of the dreams he’s either been on edge/guard as in prepared…very busy (but finds the time to help/answer questions/say hello to me)….  last night’s dream he was relaxed.  getting ready to celebrate (he was buying cake – asking for advice from my girl who was with me in the dream).  he seemed to have no place to go –  no sense of urgency about him whatsoever.  i am taking that as a very good sign.  in the shower today i saw a line of dominoes in my minds eye.  i feel he has lined up all the dominoes – done all of the necessary prep work – and now he can push them over and let those of the clean up do their work.

i gotta tell you i feel very humbled.  i feel i have been given sideline seats to this unfolding.  and all has been an absolute surprise given i didn’t even vote in the 2016 election.  i was already in the know about hrc.  and i didn’t like trump.  i had fallen for the media’s version of his character.  to say i was apathetic about the world and system changing is an understatement. i thought i was done w/having hope for change.  you know – REAL change. however when i woke up the day after the election and felt this amazing sense of peace and calm and liberation that i simply could not explain or understand w/my human brain, i began to do my research into this man.  i discovered i not only liked him – i admired him.  deeply.  and like so many of us, fell in love with him and what he is so obviously “meant” to do at this time.  then the dreams began during this time which only added to my expansion.

amazing times we are in.  thank you for being a part of it with me.

much love,

victoria

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hello all of You’s~

i don’t know if it’s the solar winds and all of that or the gentle detox i’m undertaking – or the chemtrailing – but the body is feeling a bit challenged today.  achy.  cough and congestion/inflammation.  i picked up some activated charcoal to add that in.  taking it slow of course.  tonight will include foot massager, body massager and an epson salt foot bath.  for now i am doing stretching which alleviates the ache/muscle tension.

i also know i am purging so not just a physical detox but emotional/mental and whatever else is me/ME – or not OF me/ME.  as my girl said the other day when i began to cough “you are releasing a lot of emotions right now, mom”.  she’s quite tuned at times.

earlier today – in the shower – i heard “forgiveness is the way out”.  out? out of “here”?  this realm?  no.  out of the portion of my prison i have created.  as i have continued to say – this is an inner AND outer experience. it is no coincidence that i heard this at this time.  for the past week i have been doing the Ho’Oponopono (i love you.  i am sorry.  please forgive me. thank you.)  my focus has been me.  when i do it with solid focus, slowly, finding where tension is within my body, it is very powerful.  i also know included in this process will be forgiveness for ALL.  for those moments of judgment i hold for others.  i am experiencing that very intensely right now. for me it’s based on my own fears.  if we’re not all on the “same page” or hold the same perception, will that only delay the flow of the awakening? for the event itself – does it really “require” a majority in order to occur?  if so that could translate into those refusing to awaken – to anything – as slowing down the process and i have moments of overwhelmingly feels of “IAMDONE IAMWEARY BRINGIT HOMENOW”.  it does seem that for each moment of inner calm i experience as a result of a message of pure love, the questions pop up again.  which to listen to?  the voice of the inner being? the voice of the brain?  love.  fear.  both on the same spectrum – fear always seeking relief which IS love.

still figuring out that one.  if there is a “figuring out”.  perhaps allowing both to just BE is the answer – for me.  i recall many years ago reading in The Peaceful Warrior that life is paradox.  indeed it is.

i am grateful to say ~ thanks to some of you!! ~ that the fridge is full of fruit and greens and healthy foods.  on the table for dinner is organic grass fed ground hamburger mixed with green onions, celery, cranberries and spices. a pure “go with the flow”.  hopefully it will taste good.  also have chopped sweet potatoes cooked in butter and a fruit/coconut milk smoothie.

’tis the season to eat be do healthy.  with the occasional cookie thrown in.

still feeling the intense need for solitude.  quiet.  that has not lessened.  nor has my ability to be around drama in particular conflict – conflict when i am witness to it and not actually engaged myself.  i am tuning in on that one to see where the healing/releasing/understanding is.  i have focused on detaching when i am witness to conflict and have seen the challenge for me with that.  as i was receiving the message on forgiveness earlier today, i also felt/heard that to the Soul – conflict is unnatural.  In fact, all that is not of the Flow is unnatural.  And I am really beginning to tune in to that – see it and feel it.  I really saw this today when I was wondering what to do with my time.  Do I do something I felt I had to do – to get it out of the way?  I began to fall into that when something within stopped me.  Go with the flow.  And if it is a choice that leaves me feeling tense within – that is not the flow.  So I said “I will tend to that when the flow is right.”

I laugh now because I don’t recall what that “doing” was so it was obviously not that important.

I leave this one with the lyric:  the weather outside is frightful but the fire is so delightful.  Grateful for my home and the warmth and protection it provides.  And grateful for all of you who continue to come here and offer your stories, your insights and your support.  I thank you all for that.

Love,

Victoria

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I am having one of these experiences today where I see the POTENTIAL as well as the REALity.  It’s a mad world – that energy becoming more palpable – for me.

Such madness arises when Truth is bubbling up from within and we refuse to acknowledge it.  It creates madness for the individual and for the collective.

Today I awoke actually saying I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS.

No power over.

No games.  And by NO GAMES I mean NO MORE DECEPTION of ANY kind which includes GUESSING and hearing endless speculations that use the words “soon” and “almost there”.  You all already know my feels on being told “you aren’t ready yet” which is just another power over program/game.

HOW does one “get ready” anyway?  By seeing the full TRUTH.

It was so strong within me that for me to wake up saying these words outloud means one thing:  I.  Am.  Done.  Truly truly DONE.

Silent no more.  Neutral, no more.  Even playing the Observer feels like a game.  Doesn’t that lead to us allowing what we inherently know is NOT OK to continue?  Is it OK to just observe when someone is being abused or harmed?  Oh just observe.  Don’t get involved.

Not in my inner world.

The madness.

The messages being given ~ these elusive messages that so often seem to produce nothing concrete.  Tangible.

Gold to be returned by October 31st (yesterday) or else…

The banksters are bankrupt.  Access to what was hidden for all is coming….Get ready….

The ongoing dangling of the carrot.

I don’t consent to that.  Love doesn’t dangle the carrot.  LOVE GIVES IT TO YOU.

This ongoing promise of abundance….I don’t know about you and your experience, but our expenses have jumped and now next month our income is actually going down.  I don’t know what to do about that – we’re budgeted down to pennies and I am worn to the bone by trying to budget and seek ways to expand on the income.

I feel as though the inner balloon – and the balloon out there – has been blown up as far as it can go – no more room for air.  If systems out there keep on adding unwanted air, the balloon is going to burst.

That is the collective feel I am now feeling…..not just my own inner experience.

(I have a lot of feels and words going on right now so please excuse the rambling…)

Last night as we know was halloween here in the states.  The concept felt completely foreign to me last night.  This day used to be one of my favorite holiday’s.  Slowly that dissipated over the last few years and last night it was painful for me to engage.  I had to force myself to take my child out on the candy collection.

But I did.  We had a few gathering’s in which we were invited to attend.  The first one – I simply suddenly could not be there.  The decorations were amazing but to see so much celebration of what’s dark and scary – including the adult costumes and some of the kid costumes – I couldn’t be there.

At another gathering, a highly programmed democrat suddenly showed her rage over Kavanaugh.  I took a slow, deep breath and it took all within me not to say “not all hold your view.  Please consider that as you are not the only one in the room.”  It came about suddenly and unexpectedly.  I was relieved to learn she had to leave.

And none of this is to say these aren’t otherwise wonderful people.  I like these people.  It is their clinging to their old programs that create discomfort for me – and sadness, loneliness.  What I WANT is to have a real connection where we can SEE beyond our societal programming.  Where such connections can come about without the inevitable disgust thrown our way when we say we support Trump – or at least the overall picture of his doing’s leading to exposure – to truth – in ALL OF US.  It is intense now – around here.  Literally every person I know around my area takes a jab at the president now – assuming I am part of that narrative because, you know – IF you have a deeper understanding much less any support of him, you’re a nut.  A nazi.  A bigot.  And that thought process comes up immediately.  I’ve seen it.

And HIS behavior is triggering every one of us who do not SEEK TRUTH. Who hide behind programming and societal politeness and politically correct speak.  HE is the catalyst for triggering these unseen things within us all that is causing the over-the-top madness we are seeing.

I feel it has amped up.

I feel this is because we are at the exit doors and we are being called to pick a door.  Make a choice.  Expand or stay in the old programs.

I feel All Of Our pieces of our Consciousness are lining up and saying “ARE YOU SURE?”  Poke, poke, poke….look within….acknowledge the trigger….see the inner story for the Truth instead of the one in the programmed mind.

I have no proof of this other than my feelings and given I am in a place where I need to SEE PROOF before I allow it to fully engulf me as the “real deal” – I leave this piece saying all I have now is hope and faith…

….while doing my best to be a humanoid in this very Mad World.  Below is my rendition of this beautiful, haunting song.

Much love,

Victoria

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Thank you for visiting and supporting my work.  This is a donation-based site and I gratefully appreciate every donation I receive. If you wish to donate or support my work financially, please click the link below OR become one of my Patron’s on my Patreon site by going here.

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Yesterday was one of the heaviest, most energetically brutal days I have experienced.  It made me feel physically nauseous at times as well as dizzy and winded.  By the time early evening came, I was a mess.  This deep, heavy energy was consuming me and I finally lashed out by breaking something I value.  That lead me to this deep feeling of regret and a huge well of thoughts of self-loathing.  (stick with me – this improves!)

Before going to bed, I let myself just feel these energies and have these thoughts.  I reached a point where I knew I could not go on one more second having this experience.  My initial choice was to simply say I give up.  But then like Neo in Matrix, that inner Eternal Light, in all of it’s quiet and NEVER ENDING Force pushed up and out of me and guided me to “surrender and KEEP GOING”.

So I did.  I went to bed feeling more solid and empowered.  Still in a lot of distress, but my narrative and thus energy had shifted.

Then I had an interesting dream.  I saw HRC’s spouse (am not saying their names or spelling them out) and he was trying to give me a gift to give to my daughter.  I was in some large warehouse – as an employee.  At first the gift seemed innocent but I immediately knew better.  I looked at it and commanded to see the Truth of what it really was – and yep – it morphed into something twisted, sick and demented.  “No thank you,” I announced, went and got my girl and left.

Next scene we’re home, my girl outside playing and I was out front.  I “felt” them coming – again.  Shit, I thought.  They’re just not going away.  I felt no fear though.  The feeling was something like a rain shower was passing over or some mosquitos – annoying pains but that’s about it.  So I told my girl to listen to me now and get inside immediately.  She listened.  I went inside and quickly but calmly shut the windows, locked the doors and as I did I thought I should have just hopped in the car and drove away.  The dream ended.

So several things to say now.  1) The power and influence of all that is resisting Love is weakening – quickly.  But just like the deep state, they still have ammo and they’re pulling out their last bag of tricks before they are forced to surrender or be consumed by the energies of Love (Truth, Freedom, Accountability/Justice).  Yes I know the Cats say pick – justice or source.  To me it’s one in the same.  So I will just leave that at that.  Love sees ALL and when ALL is seen ALL is owned.  If that isn’t Justice I don’t know what is.

2) Just as I have felt and been saying for almost 2 years now – all that is not Love (doesn’t that sound better than dark?) – all that is not love in action – will continue to resist until the last moment.  Still feeling that.  Likely why I keep surrendering – that energy is strong and front and center now – when faced with something I wish to resist – hide from. It is as it is and I am as I am.

When I awoke this morning, I saw a message on facebook on what has been transpiring and will share that in another message.  I also had a text message from brother Rick who said Clair came through and said something huge was lifted last night and now things are moving swiftly (I would add “again”).

NO KIDDING!

Tuning into this – feeling into that in my personal portal (the shower) – I felt what was lifted ~ the program of self loathing.

All who made the choice to hijack this realm run on self-loathing.  That’s what happens – that is the result – when you choose to power over someone.  You essentially hold the experience of hating thyself.  And while it’s really an illusion in that this is a temporary experience, it still does damage to self and others.  Free will has allowed for this.

Freedom however does not.  Total misalignment of energies.

They inserted that program of self loathing into each of us.  And given, for me that is, it is one of my biggest issues if not the core issue – the one emotion/experience that comes up when I go deep within my pain – I feel I have been helping to transmute that energy which means I have been not only carrying my own experience but also feeling it from them and the collective.  Yeah, ok, my brain thinks – my mind resisting this one – but it is the first feel I had about it.  Or what could be more of a possibility is because it is the program that was lifted from the matrix grid, I felt that resistance all yesterday and had such a powerful experience in diving into my own self loathing last night and into this morning.

I WOULD NOT EVER LOATHE MYSELF WITH FULL AWARENESS.

I WOULD NOT DO THAT TO MYSELF.

I told myself these words – as I looked at myself in the mirror – weeping – ok, bawling – (it is 4:44 as i type these words).  I smiled at myself – reminding myself of Who I Am.  Just – ME.

About 30 minutes later I headed to the store.  As I got out of the car, I heard “some of your family has inserted themselves.  here in xxxxx…yes here in xxxxx (as when i first heard that i thought here in xxxxx?  this place is so insignificant!).  you will see some of them in the store.”

WTFig? I thought.  I laughed it off but it felt like a very real communication.

Well wow.  Once inside the store I began seeing people – all women interestingly enough – smiling at me.  But this smile was different.  It felt eternal.  It felt like the connection we all REALLY have.  Authentic greeting. It felt like it will at Home and once this thing called The Event enters.  It was – amazing.  Beautiful.  And it happened several times.  I noticed that the clerk’s – who have been really subdued and low in energy the past few weeks – were up and enthusiastic and smiling in a brighter way.

That’s it – that’s the word – BRIGHT.  I noticed a BRIGHTNESS in all I greeted.  In whom greeted ME.  Usually I am the one to smile first – not today.

Wow did this leave me feeling light.  REALLY LIGHT.  Floatie almost.  I kept feeling “Home”.

As we arrived at this home, I reflected on the experience and at the beauty of it.  As I did I was guided to look up at the skies and saw the most beautiful rainbow I had seen.  The colors – there were more than the usual 7.  There was like a second row of just magenta pink/purple on the bottom.  I ran inside, grabbed my camera and took some pictures – but it began fading so quickly.  Below is what I was able to capture.

Happy Rainbow Days.  I hope you will all be able to tune in and feel a shift today.  Others I have spoken with who have been feeling that UGH I CANNOT TAKE THIS ANYMORE the past 1-3 weeks have also notice things feeling “better” today.

That is all….for now.

Love,

Victoria



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Thank you for visiting and supporting my work.  This is a donation-based site and I gratefully appreciate every donation I receive. If you wish to donate or support my work financially, please click the link below OR become one of my Patron’s on my Patreon site by going here.

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