I don’t know who comes here these days. Aside from an occasional comment from 2, maybe 3 people, I no longer feel much of a connection here as I once did. If you are visiting and want to see me continue, at least leave a comment. It takes a group effort to make something like this work.
So – earlier today I read something about a particular behavior – whereby an individual does whatever they want, whenever they want, however they want, without consequence, without forethought.
And I thought about that for just a few moments before my inner “yeah BUT” Spark kicked in. This entire matrix economic pay to live system does just that.
It enables governments to bomb the hell out of other countries, killing people, labeling them as “collateral damage” and are never held accountable. (wake me up when this movie is over and we actually HAVE visible accountability)
It enables banks to rip people off with fraudulent loans with exorbitant interest rates.
It allows for corporations to charge whatever the hell they want.
It allows for big business and government to poison our skies and water and air and food.
It allows for corrupt judges and court systems to follow unbelievably toxic “laws” while ignoring the most vulnerable who NEED to be heard.
Behind it all are the monsters that say: “YOU MUST PAY US TO LIVE.” “YOU MUST DO AS WE SAY OR ELSE” while NONE OF THEM are held accountable.
Try to survive in this reality taxes the heart, the Soul, driving people to either burn out or learn to use the system to keep going so they don’t burn out and become one of the millions of lost, broken people.
What a twisted, brilliant way to keep people divided. Your suffering won’t affect me, not because you are doing something wrong, but because I don’t want to get tossed off the matrix boat.
All of this talk about the Great Awakening and people are more divided – more self-isolating – more turning a blind eye – more arguing over political narrative a b and c. I see it all and I understand it all. But it still doesn’t resonate with my Soul.
It is so f’ing hard to be here now for me…. and to keep going, to get out of bed. There are so many things I want to do and some I need to do but I keep putting it on the “someday” list, hoping for that abundance while pushing myself day after day in my quest for self-promotion, looking for that right job and income generating. And jesus please I do not need anymore ideas unless it comes with “I spoke with them for you – they’re interested!” then I will GLADLY take it from there. Can we say V is officially burned. out.?
Then daily I am told “this won’t be over this year”.
Just S T O P!!!
Can I at LEAST get some $$ relief??
Can I get everyone who comes here to just pass along $5?
Is this how it ends – with me burned out – in bed – unable to do?
How many tears can I cry before the Universe connects with me?
I stood outside two nights ago – warm evening – played my harmonica and prayed. I prayed and prayed and let it go.
Something I struggle with. But I keep breathing and saying let it go all is ok.
But my body says otherwise.
And if I could just have some financial RELIEF I would feel so. much. better.
Anyway – then moments ago I see this in response to someone claiming to know how long this plan is going to take – only focused on the frigging United States when this is a REALM WIDE happening:
This has harmed me long. enough.. And as a result it harms my daughter and I absolutely WILL NOT STAND FOR THAT….. for I NEED something better for her and I am surrounded in an area I don’t belong in unable to escape because of laws and money.
JESUS IF YOU ARE REAL HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Victoria I visit your page daily and I can relate 100% to every word you write, every feeling you express, and I am in the same boat financially. I wish I could just drop several thousand bucks and send it your way, but I struggle check-to-check trying to get out of my 200 thousand+ debt. I’m not a frivolous spender; this is post-hurricane costs, ridiculous utilities, big-mortgage-mistake, inflation, etc. You are on my “if I get rich” list! Please know I appreciate you and hope that you will continue, and may this strange “movie” we are having to live in be over soon…and this supposed Great Awakening will win.