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so the past week or so i have really been feeling quite low at times – feeling how much i think i failed here with my life – my choices.  feeling like i missed the boat on all of the “stuff” and doing’s of 3d living – career success, financial success, lots of friends and family and travel and stuff, etc. etc.

mate’s been feeling the same.

and as i am seeing in some of my social media circles – others too are experiencing this at the moment.

so tonight i was nudged to visit the comment section of yellow rose’s last video from several weeks ago.  i had been listening to another channel speak of the event and the rv and NONE of it was resonating with me.

zero.  zip.  nada.  so i followed my inner nudge.

good thing i listened.  here’s what she had to say 4 days ago about all of this self-worth talk:

“Everyone has already gone through judgement. It was the main players, that they held responsible. You’ll remember it all very soon, so no worries. Its the Els that push “you’re not worthy” kind of feelings as they are very ticked off humans are leaving their control. The fact that you’re getting that sort of message, is rather telling – it tells you that you are in fact leaving them.”

my feel?  they’re indeed pissed – and they’re poking.  i had an image of this this morning.  neo – in the matrix – dodging bullets until he realized – the bullets were an illusion.  so he no longer HAD to dodge bullets.

that is where we are.  NONE OF THIS IS REAL.  we really are in a dream – and we are going to be fully waking very very soon.  (yeah there’s that dang word again – soon – but it’s all i have.)

interesting as well to me – someone in rose’s comment section shared a dream that was very similar to what i dreamed earlier this year – seeing myself in stasis.  in this particular person’s dream they’re in a medical bed – other’s around them (who they sensed they knew)- and they are waking up – feeling a lot of relief from leaving this experience here.  in my dream i saw myself and wanted to scream ‘WAKE UP!!”  anyway here’s the person’s dream:

“YellowRoseforTexas sneak me in the back door if im not redeemable k rose lol🌹…. u bout ready for this to end? Rose i had a dream.. . (i was on a medical bed and there were two people near me helping me wake up(felt like they knew me) in the dream it felt like i was waking up from this life im living… in the dream i felt very emotional, feelings of relief from leaving that place(real life here).. the place i was in looked like a medical facility … this dream came to me mid 2018 .. i wonder if this was a glimpse of whats to come...”

here’s something i recently said to a friend of mine who lives in australia: what if we wake up and realize we’re really in the same room together?

i haven’t heard back on that one.  lol

one last recent comment from Rose, which i found just beautiful – and gives me an inner relief as i have struggled with ptsd and panic throughout most of this life cycle – and everything i have explored and tried has not healed it.  in a recent day i again thought of this struggle/challenge of mine – and something stopped me and i heard and then knew – i will be healed.  may her words provide some comfort:

“She is saying – to the victims, ‘you wont suffer PTSD, you will be healed and your lives will once again be abundant with love. We are leaving & its time to let go of the fighting, anger and emotions that no longer serve you.’ And to the perpetrators – ‘you are held accountable for your actions and crimes – especially those that led to true Eternal death for so many souls here.’ She wants people who are on the exit, to understand its time to stop and let go. Justice will be served. And like Trump said..NONE of these criminals gets a free pass.”

keep holding the faith…i was wondering how to end this piece as i paused and contemplated what i’ve shared tonight and the “pokes” going on – and heard “keep holding the faith” on a video playing………so that is what i do – because it’s also Who I Am.

please share any feels, comments, stories you feel inclined to.

love to you all,

victoria

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outside earlier today – took these captures……..you will see the clear difference between the blue sky to the NNW and the chem sky to the SSE….and i saw a first today – a trail that did not widen as they normally do….instead it stayed narrow and as it drifted to the east it dispersed the “chemical concoction of sheot” as it went – leaving the skies hazy white (as you will also see below)……then there was the odd pattern too – not sure if that was from this particular trail or the ones that had been laid to the west….

program ceasing?  i’m not seeing it.  i would like to.  i intend daily.

deep breath…….as i have felt and as rose has said – they’re gonna be at it until the last moment……..then magic happens, right?  the game ends.  the program shuts down.  we see ALL – and those who long to go Home (wherever that is) go – and the rest go “west”……..i really don’t know how else to feel or what else to think now – nothing new comes – and the perspective doesn’t change even though i remain Open….

pretty blue sky to the north…..puffy white clouds….

nasty little effer – already changing the landscape of the sky (without widening)…..

some new dispersion trick?

leaving you here with something beautiful ~  garden harvest from a few days ago..;.mixed lettuce, snap peas, parsley and basil (all been consumed)….

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*an inspired piece ~ for all who feel “forgotten”….

Are you one of the forgotten ones in this land we call America?  In this realm we call Earth?

We all have stories.  Some are more painful than others.

Many of us did as we were told.  We finished school.  Got a degree.  Went out into the world with a flaming energy only to find out our degree wasn’t wanted.  Wasn’t important.  It even over-qualified some of us.

We kept at it.  Kept putting ourselves “out there”.  We believed in ourselves. We knew we had something to contribute.  For some of us, this worked.  For others, it didn’t.

That’s when we slowly became “forgotten”.

We knocked.  No one answered.

We reached out to counselor’s and organizations seeking help.  While well-meaning, most of these institutions were just another arm of the very system’s that lied to us – and only allow certain members in.

It was during this time many of us began to “feel” something was off about this reality so we searched for answers.

Days.  Months.  Years – we searched.

And we learned.  Expanded.  Some were able to find new venues – and it is for most of those that they stopped the search.

Others though – we continued to search and the more we searched – explored – the more horrified we became.

Many of us began having strange health conditions arise.

Throughout all of this a solid knowing of what’s out there and what’s in here began to take form.  And we began to speak.

And the more we spoke, the more the system and system supporter’s tried to silence us.

We were attacked through money.  Through health.  Through relationships.

We continued to be WHO WE ARE.

And yet the attacks continued.  Personal efforts – not honored.

Exploring topics such as manifestation and the like only became a path of frustration as we learned – NOT ALL ARE “ALLOWED” to make it here.

In a game – there are winner’s and there are loser’s.  It is sick.  It is wrong on every level.

Throughout the journey, friends and family fall away for a variety of reasons.  They either no longer align with who you are…they are “afraid” that a bit of you might “rub off” on them.

All want that personal security net.

The personal flame of truth within continued to burn – until one day – after taking too many hits – some just collapse.  Give up.  Beyond surrender.

For others – the fight continues – the refusal to “give up” keeps one going.

But still – the knowing that one has been forgotten – by society in general – knowing one is nothing more than a commodity – that your value is no longer seen – is a pain no one should have to experience here.

And yet – many of us do.

You can know yourself – fully love and believe in yourself.

And yet if you don’t have others doing the same, you too can become one of the forgotten.

Here’s to the Remembering – of all – FOR us All.

Victoria