3.11.23 ~ Just some releasing and words on grief

 

This is for RILEY

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So……………after yesterday’s happenings – the excitement it brought was short-lived and has now disappeared and I am back to place of being so done with IT ALL.

First – we had someone walking the ‘hood asking people if they had received their latest booster.  I spoke with one of ya’s as it was happening and the appropriate term was used:  CULT.

SO DONE WITH IT ALL.  And since when is it OK much less LAWFUL to ask people for private personal medical information?  From my observing eyes – people were willingly spending time talking with him.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE???!!!!

I had to order some new clothes to replace the ones I can no longer wear because graphene oxide has shrunk me some – my mate too (very much so).  His current doc said much of his weight loss is due to the g.o.  And it’s f’ing everywhere here.  I went to pick up food last night – outside – parking lot was very busy – Wi-fi environment – and as soon as I walked outside to open my trunk I felt that familiar jab/poke in my ovaries.

I AM SO F’ING DONE WITH THIS!!!!!!!

When do we get FREE from this hell?  Hmmm?  WHEN?!

Oh but according to some who claim to be “psychic” – we still have inner work to do.

FUCH OFF.

Seriously – ANYONE who would dare even say something like that to me – yeah – FUCH OFF.

Same for the guru’s who wear long fancy names like swami wami whoopi scoopie doo – sitting on their f’ing little pedestals with their narc smiles and their twisted evil glint in their eyes – spouting all sorts of sheot including my favorite narrative:  SERVICE TO OTHERS.

Do ANY OF THESE PEOPLE – or whatever they are – EVER ask “HOW CAN I HELP YOU?  WHAT DO YOU NEED?”

Just like I DO HERE.  But people like myself – because I happen to be quiet f’ing pissed off at times – upset – angry – even scared now and then – due to suffering I AM NOT WANTING – we’re still in “hell” because I ain’t chilled enough??

REALLY??!!!

FUCH OFF with that sheot.

Then I learn a beautiful child – Riley – whose mother I have been following for awhile on a patriot social media site – the child had been in the hospital – very ill – hooked up to tubes – it was horrifying to see….. the mama screaming for help from the big accounts – without a damn thing in return – someone who may have some connections to get her something that would WORK – something like a med bed or similar.  I reached out as well – asking her where she was – what else she may need – what we can do other than doing as she was – trying to get some attention.  I return from my hike with my girl and get told by my mate the little girl died.

O M G

That was just enough for me.

Mary Beth Miskell @Miskell2024

11 March, 07:51 (E)
MY BABY GIRL!! I WANT HER BACK!! PLEASE GOD WHY DID YOU TAKE HER FROM ME GOD!! SHE WAS A MOMMAS GIRL! SHE WAS MY BEST FRIEND!! @VincentKennedy
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I cannot and do not want to go there – what this poor woman – mama – is going through now.  The rage.  The distress.  NO ONE SHOULD EVER HAVE TO LOSE THEIR BABY.  This was one mama who screamed in recent weeks about how we are saving the children – but WHAT ABOUT HER CHILD?  
Her child MATTERED.  So let’s be LOUD about this.  Please share this image – and the mama’s words – everywhere.  SOMEONE has to be a voice for the children still being ignored and neglected and harmed here.  NO CHILD NEED TO SUFFER HERE.  P E R I O D.  NOT ONE SECOND MORE.
This reminds me of something I once was told about grief.  We suck at it in the “modern” world.  At the time I was relieved to hear this as I completely agreed – having been to far too many funerals already – and always so uncomfortable at the silence while I hid in the back and wept my eyes out – wanting to scream – wanting to see REAL emotion instead of the western world approach of “hold it all in”.  I always found it strange that we’re supposed to wear black and hide – keep the tears to ourselves.  Give thanks we knew the person – know “God” has this person and called them home.  When you’re in grief – esp. the early stages – NONE of those sentiments help.  AT ALL.
Grief is messy and intense and has no convenient time period – sometimes it sneaks up on you and consumes you unless you release.  I didn’t mourn my grandpy’s death until about 5 years later – and wow – did it hit me hard.
A late friend of mine once told me of a particular culture – where their grief was public and open and loud.  REAL.  Those who suffered such a loss would scream and thrash about – and would grieve in an environment of loving support of acceptance that didn’t attempt to silence or shush them but ALLOW THEM THE FREEDOM TO JUST BE.  And in that environment, the healing slowly came.  When we feel SAFE to BE – especially in our moments of fear and grief – feeling lost and confused and as though we cannot go on one more moment – THAT is when healing can transpire in a way that is real and authentic.  It’s kinda all we got here to go on – in this reality – and I’d love to see more of this kind of “allowance” and “acceptance”.
RILEY WILL NOT BE FORGOTTEN or become just another “casualty” in this f’ing stinkin’ war.
Not on my watch.
With love,
Victoria
p.s. ~ if i learn that there will be a memorial and/or help to pay for one, i will share this here.  for now you can follow riley’s mama here.
pps ~ jokes on me. here’s another little story.  those clothes i mentioned?  2 pair of jeans:  they smell like f’ing burning oil.  !!!  i got them at kohls – i can’t afford to spend $45 on a pair of jeans but i guess now that is my only option.  likely something no one else wanted so they got marked down at kohls – so stuffed into a box and back they go and i am right back to where i started.  i am SO DONE w/this toxic reality.

 

Author: Victoria1111

Truthseeker. Philosopher. Commander of Freedom. Writer. Musician. Composer. Above all I Am A Creator.

One thought on “3.11.23 ~ Just some releasing and words on grief”

  1. Don’t think I’d have too much patience for directives like, “inner work to do” either. Looks more like “Outer Work” to my own eyes and mind. Come on people! …Let’s organize a Tax Revolt and get something done for real! …Inner work?–I’m with you –tell ’em to fuch the “F” off.

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