It’s intense…………..5.10.23

Woke up shaking. I feeeeeeeeeeeel it.

Over 320 up ~ at 5:30pm EST………

On the personal level………..My spouse’s doctor has essentially told him to find another doc – without details shared here let’s just say my spouse (and I as well) tried making appointments with him – office personnel said yes let’s get you scheduled before doc had to leave the area – never happened. Doc said can treat remotely – and yet now – nope. Apparently issues too complex and serious (which he knew from the beginning). Would have been nice to have been communicated this info. A legit doc would have assisted him in finding another doc, right? A good human certainly would. Don’t think there are any good docs out there now. Sure there are clinics that treat (in and out patient) but are far too costly for our budget. He reached out to his family – a lot of money there – (plus experience in lyme) – haven’t heard a word.

I gotta walk away from this – nothing left for me to do other than to fight back – speak out and call out the obvious BS – fighting for his right to be heard and helped and healed – which I have been doing off and on for 10 years – but I don’t have it in me to do that. And overall I have no one in my corner anyway – if I fail to forget some tidbit of a protocol yeah – there’s judgment for that too at times. If I feel I am falling down, I get told how strong I am (some help). Ain’t ok if mama has issues…..(eye roll)

So – I sit with it – shaking – watching my spouse meltdown in frustration and rightful anger – knowing the bioweapon(s) simply ruin people’s lives here and only the rich and well-to-do get the real treatment and care. No advice needed – no “try this try that” as he has tried everything others have sent my way. He needs a SKILLED Doctor monitoring him every step of the way because my spouse doesn’t have the cognitive/physical ability to do so and I don’t either (that’s like telling someone who is undergoing chemo and radiation to do it yourself) – and he needs the cold hard f’ing cash to do it. (got some triggering w/that one – 3-4 years ago i ordered a copy of JOSavin’s e-book – forgot I was on his list – now he has a new book out and for only $60 it’s yours – yep – people like him in this awakening get attention and tons of support and money while I have always remained HONEST – never claim to know SHEOT – never say THIS will happen – OWN it when my guesses don’t transpire……….you know? WHAT. ABOUT. ME. AND. MY. FAMILY.???!!!)

Praying feels empty too btw – thinking everything including god is just a matrix script. There is a Creator Energy that is within each of us – ours being very tiny here – done by evil. Tapping into that Energy is limited here – doable – but still limited.

‘Tis the truth at the moment – this ongoing nightmare moment – as I pray for the end of the lies and deception for “soon” is no longer an option or pacifying term.