My reflection came about as a result of the dream I had.  I was at our neighbor’s house – the only people we have met in our neighborhood who are awake.  The parents were sleeping and the kids were awake.  The parents had made up a bed for me to spend the night.  I was lying in the bed (one of those inflatable mattresses), thinking I really didn’t want to stay the night but I didn’t want to disappoint them.  I got up and went to check on some of the kids.  It’s interesting – they have 6 and I only interacted with 3.  The first one walked over to me and wanted some attention so I hugged him, stroked his head a couple of times and told him to go off to bed. “Ok,” he said.  The next one approached me – the youngest – and she too wanted some attention so I gave her a hug and told her to crawl into bed with her mama.  Again, she complied.  The last interaction was with the oldest (living there with them that is).  She was holding a baby girl and asked if I wanted to hold her.  Well naturally I said yes (that is who I am – have a baby?  Want me to hold it?  Absolutely!  lol).  So I held the little one for a bit – handed her back – thanked the girl then said it was time for me to go.  I told the mom I had decided not to spend the night – she was fine with that.  I don’t remember all of what she said after that – but we did have a brief conversation.  She looked tired and her husband, even more tired.  I headed home and at that, the dream ended.

I was reflecting on this dream later in the shower portal as well as how I was feeling once I got out of bed:  Absolutely drained like there was very little of “me” here (it was so intense I wondered how I was going to get through the day so I called upon Home/Heaven and asked for energy – which came).  I was also very emotional – not upset – my heart was very open and I was feeling how precious life is – how we all are.  I had some good cries.  I wasn’t sure how much of it was me and how much of it was collective – especially given the horror that happened in Wisconsin yesterday.  I then reflected on my dream and thought “why did I let myself stay longer than I wanted to?  why was I so concerned about disappointing them?”

I realized – it didn’t matter.  I felt it was now time to let myself feel the way I once did – the way I REALLY am – the way I was before I got taken and put here:  Like a child.  Trusting.  Open.  No need to keep up my guard or my armor.  No need to live in any state of fear of being lied to or deceived.  Start allowing myself to be in that innocent, child-like state again.  I also felt it was time to stop judging myself and who I am in that dream state – trusting.  That is just Who I Am.  I became this fighting warrior because of this environment in which we have been in.  I also felt the need to end the judgment I hold on myself – at least the correction process I under go – when I see acts of evil.  That is my natural response as a heart-centered, Pure Soul human being – to feel that sense of shock and horror.  So no need to tell myself not to have that emotional experience.

All of this came to me in a way that was very solid – powerful – but quiet – that feel – which always tells me it is coming from that “higher” place.  It surprised me a bit too.  Is it really safe to begin to feeeeeel into that original emotional state – that way of Being?  Does that indicate we’re very close to seeing this experience – this frequency of evil – close out?  That’s what I think.  That’s what I feel.  That’s what I absolutely intend and desire.

Then I saw something shared by my friend and sister Jules – wonderful mama to wise, open, beautiful soul/son.  I’ve shared some of his wisdom here before.  Today, she shared some new goodies/insights:

It was brief.  I was in between worlds – here and there – not asleep but not fully awake.  Suddenly I’m seeing what looks like a large window screen – but no window.  Just the screen.  I could see nothing beyond it – just like a fuzzy image – cloudy is a better term.  There was a large tear in the screen that was opening and off to the left of it, another tear was beginning to show.  Then I either woke up or returned to sleep.  I don’t remember.  I just remember I felt I was lying on my back looking at something happening.

FYI for those who don’t yet know, I have a telegram group for us.  32 members so far.  Some good finds being shared.  Check it out!  https://t.me/joinchat/lDuWut7JkLxiMTYx

Finds are next.

Love,

V.

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You know what’s been bothering me lately?  Before all of this lockdown nonsense – tyranny – began, you could ask anyone on the street – regardless of their political affiliation:  “Do you trust the government?”  I guarantee most would say “no”.  If you asked them “Do you think the government cares about you?”  Again, most would say “nope”.

And yet here we have hundreds of millions of them lining up to get the experimental poke and throwing cloth on their faces – often for hours at a time.  Why?  Because the government tells them it’s safe and effective.

Tell me again why?  As Ricky Ricardo would say, “Can you ‘splain that one to me?”  Seriously – someone ‘splain it to me because I am baffled by this one and have been for over a year.  Pre-covid:  NO TRUST UNCLE SAM.  Post-covid:  I BELIEVE YOU AND FOLLOW YOU LIKE A SHEEP HERE IS MY ARM GIVE ME AS MANY OF THOSE JABS AS IT TAKES TO END THIS.

We have Kyle Rittenhouse – a young boy who was defending himself from terrorists/bullies – and he has been under attack and assault (including by one guy today on twatter who said Kyle killed 3 black men – then later removed it).  But then we have the G Maxwell trial going on – one of the most horrific of entities in this realm – and these same people are mum.  Hushed up.  The message sent:  Evil is king.  Children are expendable.

As I keep saying – these entities are not human.  Not even sure they are in any way “real”.

Speaking of Ricky Ricardo, we have been watching a lot of I LOVE LUCY originals.  We watched this one last night.  Here’s a clip of the best part.  I laughed so hard my cheeks hurt – probably woke some neighbors too.  Enjoy!

Love,

V.

Weird night.  Again.  I slept better but I’m still exhausted.  It’s a deep Soul tired that doesn’t get remedied by sleep/rest or spiritual practice.  Temporary at best.  And I would like to know exactly why that is and why it’s been so constant/intense the past couple of months.  I get overwhelmed if I have to add in one extra chore some days.  Some are doing great and saying “BRING IT!”  Not this one.  We’re in a war with an invisible enemy and the prize is our Soul – which then leads me to think that’s mostly why I’m so tired at this time.  As the war has amped up, so has our battle at some other level we cannot “see” here.  But we feel it.  My brain struggles with that –  it wants to see.  It wants proof other than my physical symptoms and feels/hunches.  That’s how I operate.  In fact when I go too far off into “woo woo” space my logic kicks in and says “return to center”.

I was awake around sunrise – got up – got something to drink – returned to bed and went within searching for some answers.  I “get” we only see around 10% of this reality.  But that doesn’t pacify my growing need to know.  To understand.  That is OUR RIGHT.  To borrow KP’s phrase – the biggest PITA for me continues to be the children receiving the poke.  They have no choice – no voice – at least not in places of power.  How can any of this been allowed to happen?  The Divine in me says ENOUGH.  NOW!  Tuning in what I heard/sensed was our concept of “death” and “physical harm” here is an illusion.  We’re in that experience of deception.  Outside of this prison place is where truth and freedom are and as such, that’s why we have such a limited (not of our responsibility or “fault”) understanding.

Ok, I thought – I can see that.

But it still doesn’t take away from the pain ME HERE NOW is feeling.  And millions of others.  And that is where my struggle is and likely will remain until this all ends.  As I tell my girl – only love and connection with one another is forever.  Everything scary and wrong/unlawful/evil comes to an end.  And even saying that at this point isn’t providing much comfort now.

Some are hanging on.  Many just want to let go.  I don’t really want to do either.  So I get up – chop wood – carry water – remain open to Divine Guidance – distract myself – take care of the family and do it all over again the next day.  Until.

Love,

V.

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Did any of you sleep last night?  I was very tired/sleepy when I went to bed – but once there, I was wired.  I was perplexed.  How did I go from 0 to 10 on the sleepy scale?  Eventually I crawled out of bed and went to get something to drink.  I noticed a light coming inside through the blinds so I peeked outside.  Noooooo.  Not THAT again, I thought.  Their moon at it – high in the sky – almost full – saying lookit me lookit me – sending out obnoxious frequencies of some sort.

No thank you.  I am so sensitive to that dayem thing now.  So is my girl (her sleep was just as challenged).  So are a lot of us now.  Why can’t you just shut off or at least be full during the day, I asked.  There’s also some eclipse coming up too same day as the full moon.  How convenient.  I will ignore it as best as I can.

Not. My. Creation.  I would never create something that disrupts sleep.  Or pokes.  Or attacks.  You know – cause I’m a decent sort of human in that regard.

eye roll….

After I returned to bed, I slept in fits.  Too hot – or too cool.  Dreams were – strange.  Not mine.

What here now IS ours, truly?  Where here really does now fully resonate as being authentic (other than us and our connections)?  So distraction continues as I don’t know what else to do.  As I saw two other beautiful goddess Souls say today:  Barely hanging on.  Ditto that!

I am tuning in to see how we can better support one another and am thinking of an idea – private group somewhere – likely telegram – where we support one another in whatever it is we need.  What do you all think about that?  I’m feeling the need to make that more of a focus now instead of what’s happening “out there” as what’s happening “out there” feels like it’s pretty much out of my hands/control.

One of the ways I am creating some positive while engaged in distraction is baking – bread baking.  I want to get good at it.  I want to master knowing how to make that perfect loaf of artisan bread – crunchy dark crust with moist center (that is done – which I am seeing is likely a temperature thing).  I’m close.  Today I learned how to make it rise better on a cookie sheet.  And next time I know the temp I will be using.

That’s about all I have today.  Body temp is still strange – well feeling those moments of WHEW MY CELLS ARE HOT.  Mate too.  Then it disappears and I’m back to neutral.  Will share finds later.

Love to you all.

Victoria

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