Category: Daily Notes

 

I had the wonderful pleasure of enjoying a whole hour all to myself ~ in absolute quiet.  I have had to come to accept that not only does the human me strongly dislike being interrupted when I am engaged in an activity, but likely my entire Soul, Spirit and Highest Selves “feel” the same.  After the solitude came to a close, my girl and I headed out to shop for toilet paper.  (I added that in to show any new readers how normal and non-glamorous my life is – lol).  On the car ride, my girl says “I love you mama,” to which I of course replied back the same.  She then said “you seem happier when daddy and I get out of the house and give you alone time.  You smile more.”

I smile more.  Wow.

So tender, real and heartwarming, if also a little sad.  I want to smile more ~ and not just because I have experienced alone time.  But if that’s what it takes, then that is what I will create more of.  For when I am alone, I put on music and dance.  I walk around the house, blissed out in the silence, change up the energies with my peppermint vanilla room spray.  I get clear headed again.  I get to finish a task without interruption.  And I also deeply enjoy and appreciate my personal space here much more.

New Earth Realm priority:  My Own House (and the shared one of course)

After arriving home, I got dinner going.  While things were cooking, I noticed the floor needing some attention.  You know how that goes.  You get down on your hands and knees and notice everything.  So I got to work cleaning the “everything” and soon I am pissed off.  The thoughts going through my mind “why am I the only one who does this” and the like.  I stand up just as my mate walks in the side door – shoes on – walking across my now perfectly sparkling clean floor.  “BACK AWAY” says the goddess.

Absolutely ridiculous of me.  So anal.  Rigid.  Suddenly I am scratching my arms.  I feel the anger inside of me.  The impatience and frustration. I shared in an earlier piece the itching I have been experiencing, in particular my neck and arms.  I began to develop these little bumps on my arms the last couple of weeks and have rather pushed away the thoughts that I know are creating the energies behind these bumps.  Something told me to get on the computer, social media, so I did.

Aahhh, relief through divine synchronicity.  Up pops a like-minded goddesses post on these odd little itchy hives that have recently appeared on her body and what they represent.  The symptoms of releasing the old while allowing the upgrades of the cellular.  Exactly what my ever-patient Highest Selves have been sharing with me.

The experience for me, the message ~ even the Goddess asks for help now and then, including around the house.  She doesn’t have to do it alone and doesn’t need to.  Two separate issues.  Delegate.  And if it doesn’t get done, it does not get done.

I stood there reading my friends words, laughing.  I then began to follow my hunch by “wiping down” my arms.  Using the opposite hand, brushing off all that old energy, brushing away the old thoughts.  Those nasty silly rigid thoughts that make Victoria into a woman no one wants to be around, least of all myself.  Screw having a sparkling clean floor.  It is much more important to have a sparkling Inner and Outer Me.  

So I can smile more.

After doing this exercise, the itching disappeared.

Of course it did.

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Another thought I had earlier today, a synching up of understanding ~ I had an experience that felt like happened in under a minute when it was more like 7.  I looked at the clock and thought “no way” and that is when I got it.  The ego lined up with the inner me in one awesome moment.  I saw where MY experience of “time” doesn’t align with something like a mechanical device’s version of time.  I saw and felt the meaning of those words “there is no time”.  I got it!  Another tetris moment!

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The energies of today ~ a variety of them.  Blissful at times.  At times drugged-like feel.  Almost heavy.  I know this – at least for today – I feel things are falling apart, breaking away and WE are putting back the pieces of this puzzle based on what those old no-longer serving things (people, thoughts, experiences, places and spaces) WE let go of to let the NEW in.

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I got on social media today to share a brief request of energetic support as I witness much in my life fall apart.  I did not wish for energies of sadness but energies of strength and encouragement and abundance.  No sooner had I done this but I began to scroll through my feed and saw numerous posts by other beautiful souls saying the same thing.

Wow…

A collective call resulting from a collective experience – for many on-going.

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

The Source In Me Says NO MORE.

We will not have this suffering and lack anymore.

We ARE remembering our power again and in that state of Being we shout out and intend a resolute ABUNDANCE FINANCIAL FREEDOM LIBERATION NOW.

We will not be over-powered any longer.

We will not be controlled any longer.

We will not be told what to do where to live how to live.

The Source in me says the following:  I absolutely will NOT allow for one more person to struggle financially.

I absolutely will NOT allow for one more person to be faced with homelessness or health issues needing healed but lacking the funds or insurance coverage to do so.

I absolutely WILL NOT allow one more second to pass while technologies and funds remain held up by cowardly, spineless ones who have NO positive intentions other than seek to control and dominate.  TIME IS UP.

I can forgive.

But I will not forget.

Forgiveness will come when I am at the energetic state to do so.  Those claiming we need to forgive FIRST before we receive this technology and blessings or that system was put in place so we can learn lessons need to take those thoughts to another timeline as they do NOT belong on the timeline of L O V E.

We know what LOVE is.

We do not need to be hammered down by slave masters and abused by financial controllers and denied our INHERENT rights of freedom and abundance in order to know what LOVE is.

So again, the shift to abundance and freedom for all is NOW.

I, Source In Victoria’s Physical Body deems it so.

And so it is.

Thank you.

 

 

the time for talk is over. the time for waiting is over. the time for speculation is over. i am no longer willing to be a slave to corporations or bogus laws that do not support my Divine Freedom. are we going to keep waiting for change or are we going to demand it by unplugging from this system en masse?

 

Reassessing some things.

Spent time today and threw out a bunch of old letters, cards that held no meaning for me.  I am ready to toss out all that no longer resonates and start anew.  Also tossed an old antique table I have held together with wood glue and lately, duct tape.  Pathetic, I thought.  I am worth more than this, I asserted, tossing it into the trash.

The time for breathing, waiting, intending, letting go and being patient has expired.

Feeling the need to end all projects, relationships, objects that are not rewarding me in ways that are supportive of all of my needs.

Feeling like I am standing in the middle of a road, naked, no sense of what to do where to go but ready for some guidance and assistance ~ meanwhile being reminded I owe this and that and oh here’s another added this and that while being told I am not good enough/smart enough fill in the damn blank.  We are supposed to be our own hero’s and rescue ourselves.  Fuck that shit.  GIRL IS IN NEED OF HELP!!  Until then, I stand, sit, alone, asking myself what is it all for.  Moments of temporary, fleeting beauty and hope in what otherwise has been a life of wasted moments, pain, neglect and lies.

I need love.

Huge financial blessings and and real opportunity to expand myself, my life, heal myself.

Friendship.  Mentoring.

Open doors.

And good long vacation where I am pampered for a time.  My body and mind are weary of this journey.  I am spent – in all ways.  White flag has been tossed into the ring.

And so it is.

 

 

Well, I wore the grumpy hat late in the day.  It’s hot out here and smoky, which cuts in on bikes and walks and trips to the park.  I wasn’t having it. Something told me to use the time to do some fun stuff inside.  So we played blocks for awhile.  I then played the piano.  Was I satisfied?

Not one bit.

I have moments these days where I think my Highest Self has gone incognito – at least when it comes to guiding me as to where to go and what to do next to create this change I so much for it feels like a balloon in me waiting to be popped only I don’t know where the pin is.  My god the frustration around this.

So those thoughts began to rumble through my mind.  By the time dinner came, I was not particularly wanting to be around my family much less my own mind.

After deciding to just face the heat and haze, I took a walk and played some frisbee with the small person, then hit the showers to soothe my hot, dusty body.  It was in there I remembered my own words:  Bless everything.  Every.  Single.  Thing.

So I did just that.

I blessed my grumpy moods.  I blessed my frustrations and fears and feelings of stagnation.  I blessed my tired body and my wrinkled knees (when did THAT happen??!).  In time, I was doing a little dance and singing.

Mood ~ transformed.

And there you go.

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I read this past week where the eclipse energies will be bringing forth new thoughts, and when we have them, we are to pay attention instead of dismissing them.  Those who shared this thought weren’t joking.  Today I am being given many different, new thoughts including some twists on “older” thoughts.

Sitting here out back, I’m watching my girl play in her pool.  I told her how newborn babies instinctively hold their breath when submerged in water but lost that skill around 6 months or so.  Why is that?  Why is it so many of our innate abilities are “lost” (or as I say, go dormant) over time?

I then thought about my own swimming abilities.  This incarnation has left me struggling with the ability to swim even though intuitively I LOVE water.  I know I drowned in a previous incarnation and came into this world in this incarnation seeing a pool for the first time, and knowing at just 6 years old that I had drowned before.  This experience has obviously played a part in my learning to swim.

I then thought of the matrix grid ~ how each of us have been programmed into it.  How it is likely certain experiences have been put into our programming by this matrix grid to keep us detached from who we really are ~ trauma’s and the like ~ all the while far too many well-meaning truthseeker’s continued on the matrix programming channel by saying these experiences are what we asked for to learn and grow and blah blah ad nauseum.  That aside, for me, this would be the swimming issue (that has made it difficult for me to know who I really am).  Got the clarity on that one today.

I thought back to my memories of Lemuria (or the lifetime/place in which we have labeled it as such).  I thought back to an experience I had over 15 years ago while part of a metaphysical study group.  This was before I began having past life recalls much less any memory of Lemuria (or knowledge thereof).  We were guided to go to a scene in our mind that felt calming.  I saw myself standing by the edge of a lake.  I was not clothed. It was me ~ but it wasn’t me.  My hair was wavier and shorter ~ and I was taller. I let the scene play out and suddenly I did a perfect dive into the water and swam like a mermaid.  Me?? I thought.  That was really ME?!  It sure felt like me.  I didn’t give it much thought after that and let it go.

So back to today ~ I then thought about the memories I have had of being in Lemuria.  I have seen myself.  And today I realized that meditation image I had some 15 years ago was in fact me in Lemuria.  The image of Me was exactly the same as the Me I have seen in Lemuria.

Are you still with me?  lol

I feel what the matrix grid has put into me, programmed into me, was the experience of drowning as a means to keep me afraid of water and thus making it more difficult to remember who I really am and who I really have been and most importantly all of my experiences from life in Lemuria ~ important because our experiences back then were unadulterated.  Pure.  Pre-matrix days.  All of our DNA activated and in full use.  I know this to every piece of Who I Am.

What this shows me though is that while the matrix grid has known the human elements of me – they cannot alter the Highest Selves of me which holds the Truth.  They cannot alter Source.  And these beings who created this grid, having likely wanting to destroy Source through their programmings, knew they couldn’t so the next best thing was to do that to the physical beings. We humans.  Perhaps they even thought Source could be weakened by keeping us under the illusion of separation via forgetfulness (and other) programming.

Obviously this veil was temporary.  Truth is the most powerful of all frequencies.  To me it is of such a frequency that even the greatest of all encryptors could unlock or alter.  It simply MUST be known.  Seen.

I will close this one up now and begin another piece ~ also on fear-based programming and what I feel we are being called to do next.